Jihad Watch Board Vice President Hugh Fitzgerald explores the implications of Muslim attorney Tom Nelson's assertion that a bellicose version of the Qur'an distributed in Oregon is somehow anomalous:
"This version of the Quran was printed before the Sept. 11 attacks, when jihad did not have the same holy war connotations as today, Nelson said." -- from this articleIt was an earlier version, an uncorrected version, of the Qur'an that was distributed in Oregon. Please ignore all previous versions. They are full of typos. Read only the new edition, the one that has on the cover the special "For Americans Only" lettering across the top, and the CAIR Seal-of-approval ("Tells you all you really need to know about Islam") and a scholarly introduction by Professor Michael Sells.
Or, if you wish, you can get the even more thoroughly abridged version, from the same company that, for last-minute and lazy students, offers a version of Anna Karenina in eleven pages and King Lear in three. And that 8-page version of the Qur'an will naturally carry blurbs:
"This is certain to be, for Infidels, the most painless way to learn about the Qur'an. This book should be -- no, this book definitely is -- required reading for today's crop of Infidels. And if its lessons are understood, then the whole family may be ready for the full text. Why make life even more difficult for your children than it would be otherwise? Read this book now. Read it as if your life depends on it." -- Douglas Hooper, Washington, D.C.
"In the breathtaking poetry of its misty vistas, from the highest hill of humanity where nightingales and roses bloom along the verdant slopes of the high uplands of justice which has always been the voice of the oppressed speaking truth to power, even when that power has gone out, but if one knows where to find the light-switch of the human heart, this is the book which can turn that light-switch of that human heart, not to mention the sometimes also necessary lungs, spleen and pancreas, on again, so that not only mere man but Man is made whole, the earth is made whole, the whole universe is made whole, and made whole in the best and only possible way -- holistically. Read it, again and again and again. The purest poetry that like a tree only God could have made, only God, or quite possibly Edward Said, had one of his admirers only been able to have been there for him, when he needed me, to take dictation." -- Hamid Dabashi, New York City
"If we are to avoid a conflict of civilizations, we will need to replace conflict with dialogue, attachment to our old ways of thinking with a willingness to accept entirely new ways, and to give up those silly concepts of 'Us' and 'Them' for a much broader 'They Are We' and 'We Are They.' Since it is 'they' who are now among 'us' and not 'we' who are among 'them,' surely the most sensible and painless solution is for 'us' to give up our shopworn and outworn and useless categories, and to try to do whatever 'they' require of 'us' so as to 'reassure' them.
"And just as they -- Muslims -- need reassurance that we are not out to get them, after the Crusades, after colonialism, after Israel's brutal oppression of unarmed Palestinians, after the cruel way that Saddam Hussein, that brave Arab leader, was removed, after the neo-colonialism and then the post-neocolonialism which has no sell-by date and therefore goes on forever as long as Infidels continue to exist, not only do 'they' (the 'Muslims') need some sign from us (the so-called 'non-Muslims') that 'we' are not out to get 'them,' but just as important, we need to study the Qur'an, and much more than the Qur'an, in order to reassure ourselves. We need to reassure ourselves that we have not lost our moral bearings, not retreated into some cruel dungeon or Guantanamo or Abu Ghraib of our own narrow mindedness, need to make sure that we have not lost our moral bearings, lost all of our own habit of, or habitat for, humanity.
"And there is no better indication of our own willingness to listen to others with compassion and understanding and acceptance as they tell us what they think or what they think we should think they think, and also tell us what to think, saving us the trouble, which given all of our advantages and our privileges and our narrow-minded indifference to all those who are different from us is the least of what we should be prepared to do in this diverse world of diversity that we live in.
"When the oppressed people of this earth, in Saudi Arabia and Kuwait and the United Arab Emirates and in so many other places, want so clearly to reach out to us, to affect us, to help us see things as they see them, what better way to engage in that dialogue than to read, study, read again, study again, the book that means so much to them, means -- everything to them. Personally, I've read the Qur'an from cover to cover, and I've come to love it more every time." -- James Earl Carter, Georgia
"If you can only read one book in your life, let this one be it. Sometimes, you come across one book that makes all the difference. This is that book." -- Statement of the Joint Committee on Civilizational Literacy, a cooperative effort of the Modern Language Association, the American Historical Association, the American Association of University Presidents, the American Association of University Professors, and MESA Nostra
"The book our generation needs." -- Britney Spears, Honorary President of the What-Our-Generation-Needs Foundation (a 501 (c)(3) organization)
The quote from Douglas Hooper...isn't
he Ibrahim Hooper of CAIR notoriety?
A leopard cannot change its spots.
Hugh, I haven't laughed this hard since the one about "we're all Turks now!" This is hysterical.
Hi folks!
There has been some question about my religious status apparently in that some people think I am a Muslim. For the record, I am not now, or ever have been, a Muslim.
Secondly, I have been blocked by from using Jihad Watch and many other sites at the ISP level, presumably without the ISP's knowledge (their techies claim that they do not block sites). For the information of anyone else having this problem, you can access Jihad Watch using a proxy like Anonymizer but it costs money and, if you use their free proxy, you can't post.
Thus, first of all, I recommend reading this great article about bypassing internet censorship:
http://www.zensur.freerk.com/
Then, you can do further research, or decide to use one of the options that the author describes depending on the method of censorship being used.
My ISP seems to be blocking access at the DNS server level, so when my browser calls for the IP address, it comes up as no address found.
Upon some reflection, I decided to use an anonymous surfing method called JAP, available here:
http://anon.inf.tu-dresden.de/index_en.html
The only caveat that I have with JAP is that it slows your surfing speed down; however, that is a small price to pay for the ability to bypass censorship.
The Mobots are trying to shut us down folks but they don't know who they are are messin' with. LIVE FREE OR DIE!
Mentat, glad to see you back with us.
Hugh:
Re: "The book our generation needs." -- Britney Spears, Honorary President of the What-Our-Generation-Needs Foundation (a 501 (c)(3) organization)"
Now I know that you are writing satire (aren't you?). Mark Steyn couldn't have done it better.
Rebecca:
Thanks. You cannot believe how frustrating this censorship has been for me. First of all, I couldn't believe it was happening. Then, my ISP denied it was happening and blamed me, the victim. So, then I had to do all this research on internet censorship and figure out a way to bypass it.
You don't realize how precious your freedom to think and your freedom of speech are until someone takes them away.
Muslims are infiltrating everywhere, trying to shut down any discussion of Islam, as per Muhammad's example. If you reading this Rebecca, I recommend that JW have something about how to bypass internet censorship on the site.
Not that it would do any good - if my ISP is being blocked at the DNS server level, then literally hundreds of thousands of people are unable to access Jihad Watch, FaithFreedom, MEMRI, DanielPipes.org (just a handful of the sites that I was being blocked from). If people don't even know of the existence of those sites and just come upon them by accident in a web search, then when they can't access them they probably won't think twice about it. I find this situation deeply disturbing.
Anyway, as soon as I get some spare time, I am going to light a fire under my ISP and put a stop to this BS.
Mentat, you seem to be laboring under the delusion that I know the difference between and ISP and a DNS. It's all greek to me.
Maybe Robert is aware of this. If not, perhaps he is now. Very, very strange to say the least.
For what it's worth, I did miss you and was wondering what happened to you. You've always been there sharp analysis and wit.
Censored!!?? Bah!
Rebecca at JW writes:
"Hugh, I haven't laughed this hard since the one
about "we're all Turks now!" This is hysterical."
And that is the most powerful weapon in the current fight. Ridicule, satire, lampooning, laughing.
Mohammad himself couldn't stand to be made fun of,
Remember Abu Afak and Asma Marwan? We'll all share their fate if the mohammadans aren't dealt with
now.
Mentat,
I couldn't understand most of what you were describing; all I got was that you are having a problem posting on here. There's a vast divide almost as unbridgeable as that between Muslims and Infidels -- and that's the one between the Computer Literates and the Computer Illiterates.
Re these bowdlerized Korans: someone should publish bowdlerized Bibles:
1) a New Testament with only the violent passages included -- it would be about one page long (mostly from John's Apocalypse).
2) an Old Testament with only the violent passages included -- it would be about, oh I'm guessing 20 pages at most, perhaps a lot less. Or, one could modify that by including only the passages that show God or some key revered figure (Moses, Abraham), or some Israelite specifically saying that God is ordering him enjoining violence -- this would probably be 5 pages tops, perhaps a lot less.
In both versions make clear at the beginning how many pages the originals had before they were whittled down to size.
For the discussion of allah being the word for God in arabic, it may be the same word but it is not the same being.
I can call a weed a rose, but that doesn't make the weed a rose. (Apologies to William Shakespeare)
Islam has accepted the "god of this world", the one who would usurp the Throne of the True God. We were warned of this from the beginning. Compare the aims of the islamic "god", then look at what the God of the Bible asks of us.
*Love your neighbor as yourself*
Bukhari:V4B52N196 “Allah’s Apostle said, ‘I have been ordered to fight with the people till they say, “None has the right to be worshipped but Allah.”’”
Qur’an 47:4 “So, when you clash with the unbelieving Infidels in battle (fighting Jihad in Allah’s Cause), smite their necks until you overpower them, killing and wounding many of them. At length, when you have thoroughly subdued them, bind them firmly, making (them) captives. Thereafter either generosity or ransom (them based upon what benefits Islam) until the war lays down its burdens. Thus are you commanded by Allah to continue carrying out Jihad against the unbelieving infidels until they submit to Islam.”
There is a difference.
That post↑ was supposed to go on another thread. oops
I believe this constitutes a smack down.
Hugh- 100+
Tom- 0
Welcome back, Mentat.
Britney Spears...omg
Dr. Pepper, there is a bowdlerized edition of the koran out here, it costs about 20 bucks and it is called Al Furqan al Haqq, or the True criterion, and it is quite a powerful read. In the koran, mohamed boastfully challenges anyone to be able to produce a more noble book than his koran. Well, after 14 centuries, someone took up his offer, and it took him but 7 days to do it. And it took more than 7 years to translate it into English. What it is essentially, is a Christian koran. Actually, you can think of it as a line by line refutation of the entire koran. It is written in sirat, or chapters the way the koran is written, with the same chapter names and all. You can find it at a site called Anwsering Islam.
Now, if you want to have REAL fun, may I suggest a "Precious Moments" Koran... with all the cutesy dopey illustrations that plague, I mean, highlight so much of Christian theology.
"For the discussion of allah being the word for God in arabic, it may be the same word but it is not the same being."
-- posted by Carolyn2
Actually, Ilah is the word for God in Arabic. Allah is the personal name of Islam's God, much as Yaweh is the personal name of Judeo-Christianity's God.
To me, based on the available evidence at hand, the personal name of Islam's God should be Beelzebub.
On a related note, at first Islam's God used the personal name Ar-Rahman. It's right there in the World's Greatest Book, the Koran. But, after Mohammed's rejection by the Jews, God changed (abrogated) his pesonal name to Allah.
Imagine that: a God who couldn't keep his own name straight.
Cynics point out that Allah had been a longstanding rock God in the Ka'aba, and that Mohammed chose Him to lord over the black meteorite there, you know the one the moon worshipper's circumambulate counter-clockwise (i.e., Satanist-style) when on Hajj to the Ka'aba.
Hugh: I have been looking for more info on that Statement of the Joint Committee on Civilizational Literacy, but can't find any on the web. Do you have any links? Esp from MLA,etc.?
I'm sorry you couldn't locate that Statement of the Joint Committee on Civilizational Literacy, but actually, I'm not surprised.
If still interested in obtaining more information, you might telephone Dwight Bolinger, Office of the President, Columbia University, and ask for more information about the Statement on Civilizational Literacy. Or you could contact some of the well-known professors who helped generate that Statement. I would recommend you start with Professor Diane Eck, who heads the "Pluralism Project" at Harvard Divinity School, and University Professor Cornel West at Princeton. Remember -- their students certainly do -- that these are extremely busy people, world-class authorities at our world-class research universities, and terribly busy with important ongoing projects. Professor Eck is working on a model for all mankind, for all time, of religious, sexual, and all other conceivable forms of difference requiring tolerance, including tolerance of both tolerant and intolerant people alike. Needless to say, the model shows great promise of being accepted by people everywhere without further ado -- or at least, just as soon as the multi-year foundation grants supporting the work come to an end and a relevant U.N. resolution or two is passed. Professor West is not one whit less busy, given that he is now working on the permanent establishment of World Peace and an End to Poverty. No, sorry, I got confused. It is Professor Jeffery Sachs of the World Institute at Columbia who is Ending Poverty once and for all, if only people will let him. Cornel West has decided to limit himself to establishing World Peace. Don't be disappointed if neither Eck nor West returns your call. But do let me know, and I will supply the names of others to contact. So many lay behind the creation of that Statement, that I couldn't possibly list them all.
Or, if you are interested in information on how to defend global jihad and make money by saying and doing morally abhorrent things, call Tom Nelson. Tom Nelson is also apparently defending Soliman Buthe (officer of the al Haramain Islamic Foundation in Ashland) indicted on a fraud charge related to funding the jihad in Chechnya.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A36678-2005Feb18.html
I wish I were joking.
"A masterpiece of satirical observation."
-- Beagle (ASPCA)
"Compassionate....Merciful....I have no words....At the moment...."
-Pinter
"rofessor Eck is working on a model for all mankind, ... requiring tolerance, including tolerance of both tolerant and intolerant people alike."
That model will likely not include tolerance for tolerant people who have intolerance of intolerance.
Mentat:
I'm sorry for your trouble with censorship! This is a problem we can expect to increase. Just recently, on a trip in Switzerland, I also found access blocked to JW/DW due to "category 14", which was supped to block access to "hate-sites"...
It is hard to believe that we should be having these problems this day and age. But we must bring this stuff out in the open and attack these firms that do block access.
Allah is NOT the personal name of the Muslim God, in fact the Muslim god has 99 names, such as Khaaliq (the Creator).
Allah is a contraction of Al Ilah, and Shaugn was correct Ilah is Arabic for god, however Al Ilah meant The (chief god) who was Hubal (the Moon God, that god whose sign is the Crescent moon). Through useage Al Ilah is contracted down to Allah, or in English Al'lah.
For the discussion of Allah being the word for God in Arabic, it may be the same word but it is not the same being.
-- posted by Carolyn
___________________
Not only "not the same being" but no being at all.
"I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end, the first and the last." That means no gods before Him, non after, and certainly none in between.
Imagine that: a God who couldn't keep his own name straight. Posted by Shaughn
Doesn't he have 99 names? Who could remember 99 names? I'm surprised the muslims don't capitalize on allah's 99 names whenever they are reminded that allah was a pagan deity in pre-Islamic Arabia.
Why aren't they saying, "Ok, if you don't like "allah", how about one of allah's other 98 names?" I am genuinely curious as to why a deity would need 99 names and only use one of them.
The quote from Jimmy Cater is priceless. What better ammunition to completely discredit him to those liberals who still revere him but who are also hip to Islamic intolerance.
Sorry Mentat. I deeply apologize for saying that you were a muslim. I must have gotten you confused with some-one else. Please accept my apologies.
"Chain letters," said the Tyrant. "The Chain Letter to the Ephebians. Forget Your Gods. Be Subjugated. Learn to Fear. Do not break the chain -- the last people who did woke up one morning to find fifty thousand armed men on their lawn." -- (Terry Pratchett, Small Gods)
Cuius testiculos habes, habeas cardia et cerebellum. - Terry Pratchett, Small Gods)
Translation: “When you have a good grip on their balls, their hearts and minds will follow.”
Pratchett translates:
"When you have their full attention in your grip, their hearts and minds will follow." The correct translation was supposedly featured on a sign in the office of Chuck Colson, one of the Watergate conspirators
The personal name of my god is "Robert", but don't call him Bob. That makes him testy.
I think I got a Harry Potter version of the Koran. Once it found out I was an infidel, it started snapping shut on my fingers. Then I hit it with a kosher dill and it burst into flames.
Would you believe for 5 seconds that Peanut Carter or Britney Spears read the Koran?
In Georgia speak: I nearly has a fit when I reads that!
Because Hugh wrote "James Earl Carter" I had to re-read the whole thing twice!
I never knew the full name of this fool:
Just soak him in peanut butter and dump five tons of salt on him and be done with it!
Funniest stuff I've read in a while. Hamid Dabashi is lampooned in all his spaced out glory.
Hugh, I know you don't want me to do this, but...
I am glad to see that some of the commenters here have been getting the joke, but since I have also received astounded emails from those interested in various of the people apparently quoted above, I have to say: this is a parody, people. These quotes are not real.
Cordially
Robert Spencer
Robert,
Gosh darn it. Did you have to go and spoil things?
OT - can't seem to find the word 'gullible' in any dictionary. Really annoying!
Oh well, off to try the famous echo in the Reading Room of the British Library.
We ought to remember that the Jihad lovers [not JW lovers] preface recitation of passages from the Quran with "bismillah al-rahman al-rahim..." In the name of Allah, the Merciful the Compassionate...
Wow! Talk about false advertising!
Now as far as Jiminy Cricket is concerned, or whatever his name is --you remember him, don't you? Billy Beer's brother? I just feel that Jiminy comes out a few degrees too literate, although we do have poetic license. After all, how can we put Jiminy's real words into his mouth and still get something coherent?
On the other hand, as a lover of Zion, I have to ask how come the Quran lovers forget to cite Sura V:12, 20-24, when they promote their holy book? Allah's covenant with Israel and assignment of the Holy Land to the Jews are parts of the Quran that they could use to prove how tolerant, magnanimous, etc., they are. Why don't they mention them to the press when they are touting their own liberalism, love for humankind, etc?? Be that as it may, all we seem to get in practice is Sura 9:29, Fight the infidels until they are brought low and pay tribute.