Singapore: Muslim marriage courses misunderstand Islam, teach wife-beating

Muslim marriage courses come under fire for teaching standard Islamic doctrine regarding the treatment of women. The kuffar, of course, have been buying soothing nonsense from Islamic apologists for so long that they're shocked when the ugly truth actually peeks out.

"Singapore’s Muslim marriage courses under fire," by Tiddy Smith for BikyaMasr, November 4 (thanks to David):

SINGAPORE: Singapore’s leading association for Muslim converts, Darul Arqam, has begun an internal investigation into lecturer misconduct after several attendees of the organization’s pre-marriage courses voiced concerns over violent and sexist content in the lectures and course materials. Specifically, attendees allege that male students are encouraged to beat wives who refuse to submit to sex, while female students are taught that if they refuse sex with their husbands angels of Allah would curse them.

"Righteous women are therefore obedient, guarding the secret for God's guarding. And those you fear may be rebellious admonish; banish them to their couches, and beat them." -- Qur'an 4:34

"If a husband calls his wife to his bed [i.e. to have sexual relation] and she refuses and causes him to sleep in anger, the angels will curse her till morning." -- Muhammad (Sahih Bukhari 4.54.460)

Singaporean gender equality advocacy group, AWARE, has begun an investigation into the claims. The Ministry of Culture, Youth and Sport (MCYS) has also been alerted.

The pre-marriage guidance courses, which are also supplied by other Singaporean Muslim organizations such as the Islamic Religious Council of Singapore (MUIS) and the Registry of Muslim Marriages (ROMM), are a compulsory requirement for all Singaporean Muslims to undertake before they marry. The courses cost between $100-$200 each, and, according to the Registry of Muslim Marriages (ROMM) website, the courses are conducive to developing ‘harmonious family ties’ and ‘communication skills’.

However, recent course attendees, who wish to remain anonymous, allege that the courses contain violent and sexist content. One attendee informed our reporter that a male lecturer demonstrated to the class how hard to beat wives who repeatedly refused to supply sex to husbands.

“He pulled out a chair, like this, and then started hitting the chair like it was the wife” an attendee told us. The lecturer is further alleged to have described the kind of rod that was appropriate for wife beating, and where such a rod could be purchased in Singapore.

Photocopies of course materials, which support the students’ allegations, have been passed to AWARE. The materials quote an English translation of the Qur’an, stating “as to those women on whose part you see ill-conduct, first admonish them, next refuse to share their bed, and last beat them”. The course materials recommend that wives be beaten if they commit Al Nushooz. Al Nushooz is defined in the course materials as “the disobeying of the wife toward her husband and elevating herself above what Allah has obliged upon her and her raising herself above fulfilling her obligatory role”.

The course materials specify four ways a wife may commit Al Nushooz:

“1. She does not beautify herself for her husband when he desires.

2. She disobeys her husband with respect of coming to his bed [for sex].

3. She leaves the house without his permission.

4. She does not perform her obligatory religious duties.”

This is standard teaching. Sheikh Syed Mahmud Allusi in his Qur'an commentary Ruhul Ma’ani gives four reasons that a man may beat his wife: “if she refuses to beautify herself for him,” if she refuses sex when he asks for it, if she refuses to pray or perform ritual ablutions, and “if she goes out of the house without a valid excuse.”

The materials advise husbands, “it is your right that they [wives] do not make friends with anyone of whom you disapprove”, and wives are reminded that in the event of a marital disagreement “her husband has to make the final decision and [she has] to respect it.”

The allegations are against at least two different lecturers at Darul Arqam, indicating that it is not an isolated case of teacher misconduct.

Our reporter wrote to the organization’s head religious counselor, Sister Rusmini Komzani, under the guise of a husband whose wife was refusing to have sex because she was “not in the mood”. We received the following response from Komzani:

“Your wife cannot remain silent for a long time if she is unwilling to serve. If she is angry at your advances, I believe she could be having psychological issues.”

Komzani then arranged a marriage guidance counseling session with our undercover reporter, at which he was informed that his wife’s sexual refusal was “not halal” and “totally contradictory with the revelation of the Qur’an”. Komzani passed our reporter photocopies of the same Qur’anic verse as contained in the course materials....