Recently in conspiracy paranoia Category

"Al-Zawahri said al-Shabab would support the jihad movement against what he called the "Zio-Crusader campaign."

As if any outside conspiracy could make Somalia any more awful than the jihadists have already made it. The major risk to the rest of the world, however, is that that al-Shabaab has a better conduit to export jihadists, both to neighbors who have intervened in Somalia, and to Somali communities in the West where the group has already been recruiting. "Somalia's al-Shabab joins Al Qaeda, leader says," from the Associated Press, February 9:

NAIROBI, Kenya -- Al Qaeda's leader says that the Somali militant group al-Shabab has formally joined Al Qaeda.

A video translation by the Site Intelligence group released on Thursday said that Al Qaeda leader Ayman al-Zawahri gave "glad tidings" that al-Shabab had joined Al Qaeda.

Al-Zawahri said al-Shabab would support the jihad movement against what he called the "Zio-Crusader campaign."

Al-Shabab leaders have pledged allegiance to Al Qaeda in the past, but the video -- which was posted on an Islamic Internet forum on Thursday -- is the first formal welcoming of al-Shabab by Al Qaeda.

The al-Shabab-Al Qaeda alliance in Somalia counts hundreds of foreign fighters among its ranks.

He forgot the "Zionists." In any event, the handy thing about conspiracy paranoia is that it doesn't have to make sense, and more importantly, one need not take responsibility for a situation that is said to be ultimately controlled by a powerful hidden hand. "Nigeria: Boko Haram Conceived to Destroy Islam - Prof. Bunza," from the Daily Trust, February 8:

Boko Haram was conceived to destroy Islam and Muslims in Nigeria withthe sole aim of splitting the country as predicted by the United States of America agents, the Dean, Faculty of Arts and Islamic Studies of Usman Danfodio Univeristy, Sokoto, Professor Aliyu Mohammad Bunza has said.

Delivering a lecture entitled "Who is a terrorist?," during a lecture organised by the National Council of Muslim Youth

Organisations(NACOMYO), stressed that the concept was a conspiracy to destroy Muslims and to make the prediction by the West that Nigeria would disintegrate come 2015 become a reality.

Shut up, he explained:

Bunza emphasised that Islam was a religion of peace and urged Muslims in the country to stand up to resist any attempt to label Islam as aterrorist group. He urged government and the media in the country to desist from labelling Islam as a religion that condone terrorism....

Now you know. And knowing is half the jihad. "Egyptian TV Debate on the 'Invasion' of Israeli Products into Sinai: Jeans from Israel Contained Secret Magnets Causing Infertility," from MEMRI, February 1:

Muhammad Al-Mane'i, Sinai Bedouin: There was a time when they would bring us jeans. These pants used to have belts. If you looked at these belts from the front, you'd find a secret compartment, and when you opened it, you would find a magnet inside. When we asked what these magnets were, we were told that they cause sterility.

Interviewer: In other words, it causes infertility.

Muhammad Al-Mane'i: Exactly.

Interviewer: There was a time when these jeans with belts would invade us from Israel, and we used to take the magnets out and chuck them away.

[…]

Interviewer: Israeli products contain lethal poison. You might not feel this poison now, but you will in the future. Israel will remain an enemy lying in wait for Egypt, no matter what happens and regardless of the agreements, because Israel has its eye set on Egypt.

At least 73 people were killed and hundreds injured. And of course we all know that Islam is a Religion of Peace, and therefore it simply isn't possible that its peaceful and moderate adherents would ever be moved to violence. It must therefore be the fault of...the Zionists!

"Egyptian MP Mustafa Bakri: America and Israel Are Responsible for Port Said Soccer Bloodbath," from MEMRI, February 2 (thanks to Wimpy):

Following are excerpts from a statement by Egyptian MP Mustafa Bakri, which aired on Sawt Al-Sha'b TV on February 2, 2012.

Mustafa Bakri: Our country is entering a state of anarchy. This anarchy is caused by America, Israel and the former regime. Look at the New Middle East scheme. Don't talk about all the minute details. What happened in Port Said is a continuation of what happened in Muhammad Mahmoud Street, in Al-Qasr Al-Ayni Street, across from the government, across from Maspero, and in the soccer match against Tunisia. They are all connected. It is an attempt to bring this country down.

In a way, it's kind of a compliment. In his conspiracy paranoia, he is ascribing all kinds of foreknowledge to the West. For example, the Balfour Declaration on a Jewish homeland occurred in 1917. Oil prospecting in the Mideast gained momentum in the 1930s, with especially spectacular oil fields discovered in the late '30s. When the State of Israel was established, U.S. oil production was still going strong, and would not reach peak production for about another 22 years.

But if it was all about the oil, one would think that we in our nefarious conspiring would plunk a Jewish state where, you know, there's actually oil. "'West implanted Israel into ME to control oil'," from the Jerusalem Post, January 29:

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said Sunday that western powers had implanted the Israeli regime into the Middle East as part of a scheme to gain control of the region and its resources.

“Why did they install the Zionist regime (Israel)? To gain control over oil, as well as the popular and revolutionary uprisings in the Middle East,” Iranian news agency Press TV quoted Ahmadinejad as saying during a speech at a youth conference in Tehran.

“It is clear that this was a historical scheme,” he added.

Ahmadinejad's comments came as UN nuclear inspectors arrived in Iran on a visit aimed at shedding light on suspected military aspects of Tehran's atomic work.

Iran said on Sunday it was very optimistic over the visit, but warned it would curb cooperation if the experts became a "tool" for outside powers....

The moment they feel uncomfortable, that is what they will claim.

KUALA LUMPUR, Jan 28 — Former Selangor Islamic affairs executive councillor Datuk Hasan Ali claimed today Christian ministers have resorted to handing out electronic gadgets and wearing kopiah (skullcaps) to mosques in their efforts to convert Muslims.

The Gombak Setia assemblyman, who was sacked from PAS and the state government earlier this month, told an anti-apostasy rally in Kepala Batas, Penang that Muslims in the country were vulnerable to these methods due to their lack of faith.

He said that when he was Selangor executive councillor, he received at least 60 reports of apostasy including how Muslims were enticed with money and given gifts of laptop computers, cameras, cars, monthly food provisions and gadgets like solar-powered bibles.

“There were reports of foreign Christian ministers wearing Muslim skullcaps and attending prayers at a certain mosque in Petaling Jaya to establish a communal relationship with Muslims before converting them.

“I was told these international Christian groups have unlimited funds,” he told a crowd of about 2,000, a tenth of Himpunan Sejuta Umat’s (Himpun) targeted 20,000 attendess.

Unlimited funds? How underhanded and dastardly!

The coalition of Muslim NGOs has organised several such gatherings in response to the “challenge of Christianisation”.

Himpun was mooted following last year’s controversial August 3 raid by Selangor Islamic authorities on the Damansara Utama Methodist Church (DUMC) in Petaling Jaya, where it was alleged that Christians were converting Muslims.

Hasan had backed the raid and said there “could be hundreds, maybe even thousands” of cases of Muslims being converted by Christians.

Last November, the former Selangor PAS chief told the Selangor Legislative Assembly that evangelical Christians are using high-tech devices such as solar-powered talking bibles to proselytise Muslims in the state.

Ford just got a big boost in the Salafist market. "Egyptian Sheikh: Driving a Chevy is Haram," by Angie Nasser for Now Lebanon, January 24:

"And I think to myself, what a wonderful world..."

A Salafi sheikh in Egypt has reportedly issued a fatwa that buying [or driving] a Chevrolet vehicle is haram because the American brand’s logo looks like the Christian cross.

In the video below, prominent Egyptian TV presenter Amr Adeeb takes the sheikh’s joke-of-a-fatwa to task, saying, “We’ve reached a really strange place with this.”

“The car’s been around [for a century] and only now did you notice there’s a cross on the car?”

Adeeb also notes that the car is not used or presented as a form of religious iconography: “Do we hold mass for it? Do we pray for it?” And his guest chimes in with a comment about the self-centered nature of the fatwa itself: “As if the people who came up with the logo were thinking that we want to put this special logo on the car just to piss us [Muslims] off?”

The TV presenter concludes, “With all of the problems in Egypt, you’re concerned about the cross?... We’re calling for unity [in the country] and then you come up with [fatwas] like this?”

By the way, there’s actually a few theories going around about the symbolism behind the Chevrolet logo. One common story is that General Motors co-founder William C. Durant copied the design off some wallpaper he saw in a Parisian Hotel. But historian Ken Kaufmann says the logo is actually based on iconography used by the Southern Compressed Coal Company ad for its “Coalettes” logo....

Years of observation of footage suggest Toyota pickups still have the jihadist market cornered. The duplicitous Muslim Brotherhood, for its part, might prefer "Dodge."

Since Atris Hussein almost certainly believes that "there is not a catastrophe in the world that is not the handiwork of the Jews," this paranoid lunacy probably seems perfectly reasonable to him.

"Swede arrested in Thai terror probe claims he was set up by Mossad," from Fox News, January 19 (thanks to Kenneth):

BANGKOK -- A Swedish man of Lebanese descent accused of planning a terror attack in Bangkok says he is innocent and claims Israeli intelligence service Mossad set him up.

Atris Hussein, 47, who was charged Monday with violating a weapons control law after a large amount of fertilizer and ammonium nitrate -- which can be used to make a bomb -- was found in a property he rented, told Swedish newspaper Aftonbladet he was, "100 percent innocent."

"A lot of the material police found in my storage facility had been placed there, most likely by the Israeli intelligence service Mossad," Hussein told the newspaper from Bangkok Remand Prison, where he is being held.

The father of four, who worked as a hairdresser in Gothenburg for 10 years before moving back to his native Lebanon, claims he was only involved in regular business activities involving the import and export of ice packs, paper and fans.

"The [ice packs] contain ammonia," Hussein said. "We've never traded in fertilizer. It must have been placed in our storage facility by someone, probably Mossad."

However, Thai police believe Hussein has links to the Iranian-backed, Lebanon-based militant group Hizbollah. They claim Hussein told officers that he and another man arrived in Thailand late last year with plans to stage an attack in Bangkok.

He allegedly told police that the bomb plot was called off when authorities caught wind of it.

Hussein, who used to run a business selling miniature trees, denies all the allegations and believes he was singled out because he is a Shiite Muslim and because of his political beliefs.

"I voted for the Social Democrats when I lived in Sweden," he said. "That may have made me look suspicious in the eyes of Mossad. They had an eye on me."

The Sultan of Selangor Sultan Sharafuddin Idris Shah has directed MAIS and JAIS to stamp out apostasy in the state.

TANJUNG KARANG: The Sultan of Selangor Sultan Sharafuddin Idris Shah has ordered the Selangor Islamic Religious Council (MAIS) and the Selangor Islamic Religious Department (JAIS) [Religious Police] to take strategic steps to root out a subtle attempt to proselytise Muslims.

“I was informed that the proselytisation of Muslims, which occurred over the last few years, was done covertly and those involved were cunning in concealing evidence,” he said when opening the RM5 million Kampung Gulang-Gulang Mosque here today.

Done by whom, exactly? And what alleged evidence is supposedly being concealed? Anyone who would want to ask such questions is probably a greasy Islamophobe.

He said JAIS must continuously give explanation and counselling to Muslims who had committed apostasy.

“Let me remind JAIS to be discreet in its actions and approaches so that Muslims who have began distancing themselves from Islam will… return to the fold and repent,” he added.

The wishes of said Muslims who may wish to no longer be Muslims matters not in the slightest, naturally. But if Islam is supposed to be so fantastic, why would anyone want to leave it in the first place?

The Sultan said he was worried over the emergence of apostasy among Muslims, apart from Islamic deviationist teachings, as it would damage the growth and development of Islam in Selangor if left unchecked.

The walkway was damaged by inclement weather in 2004. The new walkway was temporary, made of wood, and needs to be replaced. That's all it takes for a wave of conspiracy paranoia that Israel is out to commit dastardly deeds against the al-Aqsa mosque.

The bottom line is that there is no basis in reality for the objections except supremacism, antisemitism, and likely a fear that any excavations may bring forth more evidence of the non-Muslim history of the area. The Muslim side simply does not want Jews touching, thinking about, or looking at the site, now or ever. "Violence feared over repairs at Jerusalem shrine," by Amy Teibel for the Associated Press, December 8:

JERUSALEM (AP) — Jerusalem municipal officials said they will shut down a walkway to a contested shrine at the heart of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, a move liable to touch off a new round of violence between Muslims and Jews.

Any work in the area around the Old City compound known to Jews as the Temple Mount and to Muslims as the Noble Sanctuary draws fierce condemnation and sometimes violence from Palestinians, many of whom suspect Israel wants to harm Muslim shrines. An official with the Muslim clerical body that runs the complex warned that protests were liable to break out this time, too.

The municipality says the wooden walkway leading to one of the hilltop site's gates — built as a temporary structure after a centuries-old ramp was damaged in a 2004 snowstorm — is a fire hazard and structurally unsound and must be replaced. In a letter released Thursday, Jerusalem city engineer Shlomo Eshkol informed authorities of his plan to block access to the walkway to all but security forces. The shutdown could take place immediately after a one-week public comment period.
Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu halted a plan to demolish the walkway last month, fearing a regional backlash at a time when pre-election violence was roiling Egypt. A spokesman for Netanyahu was not immediately available Thursday for comment on the Jerusalem municipality's latest move.

The walkway is not the only access to the contested complex, which Israel captured from Jordan along with the rest of east Jerusalem and the West Bank in the 1967 Mideast war. But the compound's centrality to both Islam and Judaism makes it one of the most combustible sites in the world. Clashes there in the past have ignited broader violence.

Muslims believe their Prophet Muhammad ascended to heaven from the site, which is home to the golden-capped Dome of the Rock shrine and the Al-Aqsa mosque. It is Islam's third-holiest shrine.

Credit where credit is due: this wording is a refreshing change of pace from "The Prophet Muhammad."

The compound is venerated by Jews as the site of their biblical temples. The Western Wall, Judaism's holiest prayer site, stands at the foot of the complex, and a women's prayer area is situated right near the walkway.

A Muslim clerical trust known as the Waqf runs the compound under Israel's overall security control.

Yusuf Natsheh, director of the Waqf administration, said the Waqf was not consulted about the plan to shut down the walkway, which he called a "disastrous" policy liable to touch off protests.

"This is a very sensitive issue," he said. "It is so close to the mosque, and Palestinians, Arabs, Muslims ... all over the world will be unhappy."

They think Israelis are "eradicating their historic road, they are eradicating their heritage" under the guise of security concerns, he said.

Nearly five years ago, hundreds of Israeli police fired stun grenades and tear gas to disperse thousands of Muslim worshippers who hurled stones, bottles and trash in outrage over earlier Israeli repair work in the area.

Nothing to see here. Repeat after me: the Muslim Brotherhood is "moderate." The Muslim Brotherhood is "largely secular," because the Obama administration's director of national intelligence said so. This is all a misunderstanding and has been taken out of context, because you don't speak Arabic, and surely there are nuances on the word "kill" to consider.

Nothing to see here. "Cairo rally: One day we'll kill all Jews," by Eldad Beck for YNet News, November 25:

A Muslim Brotherhood rally in Cairo's most prominent mosque Friday turned into a venomous anti-Israel protest, with attendants vowing to "one day kill all Jews."

Some 5,000 people joined the rally, called to promote the "battle against Jerusalem's Judaization." The event coincided with the anniversary of the United Nations' partition plan in 1947, which called for the establishment of a Jewish state.

"Against Jerusalem's Judaization": hysterical historical revisionism.

However, most worshippers who prayed at the mosque Friday quickly left it before the Muslim Brotherhood's rally got underway. A group spokesman urged attendants to remain for the protest, asking them not to create a bad impression for the media by leaving.

'Treacherous Jews'

Speakers at the event delivered impassioned, hateful speeches against Israel, slamming the "Zionist occupiers" and the "treacherous Jews." Upon leaving the rally, worshippers were given small flags, with Egypt's flag on one side and the Palestinian flag on the other, as well as maps of Jerusalem's Old City detailing where "Zionists are aiming to change Jerusalem's Muslim character."

Propaganda material ahead of Egypt's parliamentary elections was also handed out at the site.

Spiritual leader Dr. Ahmed al-Tayeb charged in his speech that to this day Jews everywhere in the world are seeking to prevent Islamic and Egyptian unity.

"In order to build Egypt, we must be one. Politics is insufficient. Faith in Allah is the basis for everything," he said. "The al-Aqsa Mosque is currently under an offensive by the Jews…we shall not allow the Zionists to Judaize al-Quds (Jerusalem.) We are telling Israel and Europe that we shall not allow even one stone to be moved there." [...]

Throughout the event, Muslim Brotherhood activists chanted: "Tel Aviv, Tel Aviv, judgment day has come."

Speaking to Ynet outside the mosque following the prayer, elementary school teacher Ala al-Din said that "all Egyptian Muslims are willing to embark on Jihad for the sake of Palestine."

"Why is the US losing in Afghanistan? Because the other side is willing and wants to die. We have a different mentality than that of the Americans and Jews," he said.

"Polio was affecting eight northern Nigerian states - two more than a few months ago."

This is the human cost of conspiracy paranoia about elaborate plots against Muslims. Even though the main event was eight years ago, suspicion still surely lingers, and untold numbers of Nigerians did not receive the vaccine, and did not have their children vaccinated. They are now surely among the victims.

If groups like Boko Haram have their way and manage to stamp out citizens' ability to become educated and think critically in sufficient numbers, such paranoia will spread all the more freely, and there will be even more of a cost in years to come.

"Polio in Nigeria 'shows big increase'," from BBC News, November 21:

A four-fold increase in polio has been reported in Nigeria, with the disease spreading to other countries, a World Health Organisation official says.

Forty-three cases were reported in Nigeria this year, compared to 11 last year, the official, Thomas Moran, said.

Curbing the polio virus in Nigeria is key to eradicating the crippling disease in Africa, he said.

In 2003, northern Nigeria's Muslim leaders leaders opposed vaccinations, claiming they could cause infertility.

Nigeria is one of four countries in the world - along with Pakistan, India and Afghanistan - where polio is still a major health risk.

'Strong leadership'

Mr Moran told the BBC the disease had also spread to neighbouring Niger, Mali and Ivory Coast.

"The success of polio eradication in Africa rests on Nigeria interrupting the virus," he said.

Polio was affecting eight northern Nigerian states - two more than a few months ago, the head of Nigeria's National Primary Healthcare Development Agency (NPHDA), Dr Ado Muhammad, told the BBC.

Mr Moran said the Nigerian government had shown "strong leadership" in the campaign to eradicate polio and the WHO had been carrying out large scale vaccination programmes to prevent the disease from spreading.

"The immunity profile of Nigerian children is far better [now], which limits the risk of international spread of the virus," Mr Moran said.

He also stressed that the number of children affected remained low.

"You can call it a four-fold increase but it is still very low transmission in a country as large as Nigeria with almost 50m children under five," he said.

At the Commonwealth summit last month, the leaders of Nigeria, Canada, the UK and Australia pledged millions of dollars towards the global effort to eradicate polio.

In 2003, the northern Nigerian state of Kano backed Muslim religious leaders in opposing an immunisation programme, claiming it was a Western plot to make people infertile.

Health experts say this led to many people becoming infected by polio.

The clerics and the state government later dropped their opposition to the immunisation programme....

KUALA LUMPUR, Nov 17 — Evangelical Christians are using high-tech devices such as solar-powered talking bibles to proselytize to Malay Muslims in Selangor, state lawmaker Datuk Hasan Ali said today.

Hasan, who is in charge of the state’s Islamic affairs portfolio, said the state’s religious authority (Jais) had discovered that Christian missionaries were now spreading their gospel through technologically-advanced means apart from setting up welfare groups providing cash and other financial aid to single mothers and the destitute.

He added that Jais’s research showed Christian evangelists were spreading their faith to young Muslim students in free tuition classes and counselling sessions, besides distributing Christian pamphlets in public places, homes, universities and places that were ostensibly called “community centres” to carry out their evangelical work.

The ex-PAS state commissioner disclosed this in a written reply to a question from Umno-Sungai Burong assemblyman Datuk Mohd Shamsudin Lias.

According to a website called Book of Joe, the palm-sized radio-like device contains all the books in the New and Old Testaments and is fitted with batteries that will run for almost 10 hours before needing to be recharged, whether by the sun, a light bulb or a nine-volt AC adapter. It costs only US$99.95 (RM310).

This latest disclosure, after a controversial August 3 raid by Selangor Islamic authorities on the Damansara Utama Methodist Church (DUMC) in Petaling Jaya, could trigger another Christian-Muslim conflict.

Christian leaders have consistently denied claims that they are attempting to convert Muslims, but relations between the two creeds with roots in the Middle East continue to smoulder in multi-religious, multi-cultural Malaysia where the religion of the federation is Islam as stated in the Federal Constitution.

Hasan said Jais is working to counter Christian proselytism of Muslims by holding sessions to clarify Islamic doctrine and its laws.

The lawmaker said Jais [religious police] is also seeking to strengthen the enforcement of the Non-Islamic Religions (Control of Propagation Amongst Muslims) Enactment 1988 as well as the Syariah Criminal Offences Enactment 1995.

Despite the total Malay-Muslim political control of the Malaysian government, police, courts, military, the media and what-have-you, and a vast gamut of totalitarian laws at their disposal, we find that Muslims can go from all powerful 'sons of the soil' to hapless victims in mere seconds. With no evidence of said 'conspiracies' required (or existing in the first place), any amount of Islamic-sponsored oppression and repression is justified indefinitely.

Raymond already posted here about the crowning absurdity of the closure of the Great Pyramid for any potential 11/11/11 observances: the allegations that Jews, Masons, or "Jewish Masons" (Jackie Mason?) planned some sort of ritual. More on this round of conspiracy paranoia and accompanying denials follow in two reports below.

"Egypt closes Great Pyramid after rumors of rituals," by Ben Hubbard for the Associated Press, November 11:

CAIRO (AP) — Egypt's antiquities authority closed the largest of the Giza pyramids Friday following rumors that groups would try to hold spiritual ceremonies on the site at 11:11 A.M. on Nov. 11, 2011.

The authority's head Mustafa Amin said in a statement Friday that the pyramid of Khufu, also known as Cheops, would be closed to visitors until Saturday morning for "necessary maintenance."

The closure follows a string of unconfirmed reports in local media that unidentified groups would try to hold "Jewish" or "Masonic" rites on the site to take advantage of mysterious powers coming from the pyramid on the rare date.

Amin called all reports of planned ceremonies at the site "completely lacking in truth."

The complex's director, Ali al-Asfar, said Friday that an Egyptian company requested permission last month to hold an event called "hug the pyramid," in which 120 people would join hands around the ancient burial structure.[...]

There will be no hugging of the pyramids! None!

The closure was unrelated to the rumors, he said, adding that the pyramid needed maintenance after the large number of visitors during the Muslim Eid al-Adha holiday last week.

Total coincidence. Nothing to see here.

The rest of the complex, which includes two other large pyramids, numerous tombs and the Sphinx, remained open Friday, though security appeared to be heavier than usual....

But wait, it gets even better: "Egypt closes Pyramids over 11-11-11 'Ceremony of Love'," from the Jerusalem Post, November 11:

Egypt's Supreme Council of Antiquities (SCA) closed the Great Pyramids on Friday after protesters said various groups, among them Jews, planned to attend a numerologist ceremony on the Giza Plateau.

Egyptian media reported that some Egyptians feared that the event would be used by Jewish Masons to reclaim the Pyramids as ancient Hebrew structures, denying Egyptians their claim to the pharaonic monuments.

One SCA employee claimed that a crew of 1,200 Jews were planning to attend the event, crowning the mightiest of the three structures with a Star of David in order to assert the claim that Jewish slaves built the pyramids, and not the ancient Egyptians, Egyptian daily Al Ahram reported.

Egyptologists have never proven whether or not Jewish slaves took part in the construction of the monuments, or even settled in Egypt in the time when Old Kingdom pharaohs commissioned their massive mausoleums.

Former SCA Secretary General Abdel Halim Noureddin told Al Ahram Jewish Masons have been trying to cap the Great Pyramid since 1931 with the Jewish emblem, so this instance should not be surprising.

According to a report from British daily the Telegraph, a Polish numerologist group had, in fact, received permission from the Egyptian government to hold a ceremony at the pyramids in order to protect the world from "cosmic forces" aimed at destroying Earth next year.

The resulting commotion surrounding the event, including the attendance of Jewish Masons, pushed the SCA to cancel the event, called the "Ceremony of Love."....

Raymond Ibrahim jockeying around his ancestors' monuments

According to the Associated Press, “Egypt's antiquities authority closed the largest of the Giza pyramids Friday following rumors that groups would try to hold spiritual ceremonies on the site at 11:11 A.M. on Nov. 11, 2011…. The closure follows a string of unconfirmed reports in local media that unidentified groups would try to hold 'Jewish' or 'Masonic' rites on the site to take advantage of mysterious powers coming from the pyramid on the rare date.”

Considering that Jews are at the heart of all conspiracy theories in the Muslim world—including through the use of bewitched animals—this is not surprising: authorities have accused Jews and Israel of using rats, pigeons, vultures, pigs, squirrels, ad infinitum as subversive agents against Muslim nations.

After a string of shark attacks in Egypt last year, for instance, an official suggested Israel might be responsible for “throwing the deadly shark (in the sea) to hit tourism in Egypt.”

Not that it matters much now, since Dr. Muhammad Salim al-Awwa just declared on the air that “Egypt has left the international map of tourist destinations this month,” thanks no doubt to its increasing reputation as a land, not of pyramids and pharaohs, but jihadi violence and religious persecution.

The report has resulted in more of Pakistan's new top export: angry denials, often blaming conspiracies. But when the supply of anything becomes too plentiful, it becomes cheap. "Pakistan rejects report of unsafe nukes," from Agence France-Press, November 6:

Pakistan on Sunday angrily rejected a report that it had been moving its nuclear weapons in unsafe conditions, saying nobody should underestimate its capability to defend itself.

Two US magazines reported Friday that Pakistan has begun moving its nuclear weapons in low-security vans on congested roads to hide them from US spy agencies, making the weapons more vulnerable to theft by Islamist militants.

The Atlantic and the National Journal, in a joint report citing unnamed sources, wrote that the US raid that killed Al-Qaeda chief Osama bin Laden in May at his Pakistani compound reinforced Islamabad's longstanding fears that Washington could try to dismantle the country's nuclear arsenal.

But in a statement, Pakistan's foreign ministry said the report was "pure fiction, baseless and motivated. It is part of a deliberate propaganda campaign meant to mislead opinion."

Pakistan has consistently rejected concerns over the safety of its nuclear arsenal and alluded to a smear campaign.

"The surfacing of such campaigns is not something new. It is orchestrated by quarters that are inimical to Pakistan," said the statement.

Who? India? Israel? The LA Clippers?

The ministry said Pakistan was capable of defending itself. "No one should underestimate Pakistan's will and capability to defend its sovereignty, territorial integrity and national interests."

After the bin Laden raid, the head of the Strategic Plans Divisions (SPD), which is charged with safeguarding Pakistan's atomic weapons, was ordered to take action to keep the location of nuclear weapons and components hidden from the United States, the report said.

Khalid Kidwai, the retired general who leads the SPD, expanded his agency's efforts to disperse components and sensitive materials to different facilities, it said.

But instead of transporting the nuclear parts in armoured, well-defended convoys, the atomic bombs "capable of destroying entire cities are transported in delivery vans on congested and dangerous roads," according to the report.

There's another reason not to tailgate.

The pace of the dispersal movements has increased, raising concerns at the Pentagon, it said.

The article, based on dozens of interviews, said the US military has long had a contingency plan in place to disable Pakistan's nuclear weapons in the event of a coup or other worst-case scenario.

Remember when we said the assessment of blame for the "anti-Islam" toy gun promised to be entertaining? Someone is bound to blame Israel or America at some point, but this explanation is actually rather creative for a change.

Sheik Muhammad Al-Amin Ismail blames Shi'ites, due to the antagonism between Ali and Aisha. Ali is accepted by Shi'ites as the first imam and legitimate successor to Muhammad. Muhammad's child bride, Aisha, was not only the daughter of Abu Bakr, the first "rightly guided" caliph for Sunnis, but also never forgave Ali for noting to Muhammad that there were plenty of other brides to choose from when Aisha was accused of adultery.

And if you believe the Sheikh, the Shi'ites decided to stick it to the Sunnis with... a toy gun that plays offensive sounds. While stories of raids have been more recent, the toys have apparently been on the market for at least a few weeks before them. "Sudanese Preacher Sheik Muhammad Al-Amin Ismail Accuses Shiites of Distributing Anti-Sunni Toy Guns," from MEMRI, September 30:

Sheik Muhammad Al-Amin Ismail: I've brought you an example [of toys manufactured by Shiites]. We all hope that the brothers who supervise these products, and their import and export, will ban products such as these.

Holds up a toy pistol

The sound might not be so clear through the microphone.

Why do they do this?

Shoots the pistol, which emits shooting sounds and a metallic voice:

"Go, go, go. Pull over. Save the hostages."

Sheik Muhammad Al-Amin Ismail: It says: "Shoot 'Aisha" [the Prophet Muhammad's wife]. This is for children. "Shoot 'Aisha."

Pistols. This one costs five Sudanese liras, this one costs seven liras, and there is a large one that costs 20 liras. Again, the sound goes: "Shoot 'Aisha."

Toy pistol sound: "Go, go, go. Pull over. Save the hostages."

Sheik Muhammad Al-Amin Ismail: "Shoot 'Aisha." Until when?

All that's missing is an assessment of blame. That promises to be entertaining. An update on this story. "Anti-Islam toy guns seized in Dibba," from Emirates 24-7, November 2:

Authorities in Dibba seized nearly 100 Chinese-made toy guns which offend Islam by mocking the wife of the Prophet (Peace Be Upon Him), the Arabic language daily 'Al Bayan' reported on Wednesday.

The guns, sold in shops, were found to be issuing sounds that sneer and insult Aisha, a few days after an Emirati female activist said she found one such gun in a shop in Bani Yas just outside Abu Dhabi city.“We have seized around 100 of those guns and we are now conducting an investigation on how they were brought into the UAE,” the paper said, quoting Khaled Danhani, head of the commercial licences at Dibba Municipality.

In Saudi Arabia, police said last week they had seized nearly 1,500 Chinese-made toy guns at a local market found to be issuing sounds that abuse Aisha, one of the most venerated women in Islam.Members of the Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice seized the toys during a raid on a shopping centre in the western town of Jeddah.

“The guns were found to be issuing sounds which are considered mocking and offending against the Prophet’s wife,” newspapers said, quoting Commission spokesman in Jeddah, Turki Al Zahrani.

Religious police are now on the lookout for the hottest new gift of the season, Blaspheme Me Elmo. "Anti-Islam toy guns found in the UAE," from Emirates 24-7, October 26:

An Emirati social expert and activist shopping in a local market stumbled across Chinese-made toy guns that issue sounds mocking Islam and called on authorities to take action against such products.

The discovery came a few days after Saudi authorities said they seized nearly 1,500 Chinese-made toy guns issuing sounds that mock and insult Aisha, the wife of the Prophet (Peace Be Upon Him).

You can't make this stuff up.

Mariam Al Ahmadi, a well-known social activist in Abu Dhabi, said she found the toy guns at some shops in Bani Yas, just outside Abu Dhabi city.

Quoted by the Dubai-based 'Emarat Al Youm' Arabic language daily, Mariam said she had reported the guns to the police and called for immediate measures. “I call upon the police and other competent authorities to investigate how these anti-Islam guns found their way into the UAE market and to take action against all those who had brought them in,” she said.

In Saudi Arabia, police said on Sunday they had seized nearly 1,500 Chinese-made toy guns at a local market found to be issuing sounds that abuse Aisha, one of the most venerated women in Islam.Members of the Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice, the most influential law enforcement authority in the country, seized the toys during a raid on a shopping centre in the western town of Jeddah.

“The guns were found to be issuing sounds which are considered mocking and offending against the Prophet’s wife,” newspapers said, quoting Commission spokesman in Jeddah, Turki Al Zahrani.He said sellers of those toys, mostly Asians, apparently do not know they offend Islam as the guns issue sounds in Arabic.

Psychology 101: Behavior that is rewarded is likely to be repeated. Behavior that is repeatedly rewarded is likely to be repeatedly... repeated.

Will Egyptian state television hold up his release for an interview, too? An update on this story. "Egypt to free 'Israeli spy' Grapel under swap deal," from BBC News, October 24:

Israel says it has reached a deal with Egypt under which the Egyptians will release a US-Israeli citizen, Ilan Grapel, who has been detained since June on suspicion of spying.

In return Israel has agreed to release 25 Egyptian prisoners.

Mr Grapel has been accused of spying for Israel during the uprising against the former president, Hosni Mubarak.

Israel and Mr Grapel's family say he was working openly for a legitimate aid project in Cairo.

The deal was announced in a statement by the Israeli prime minister, Benjamin Netanyahu.

It has yet to be approved by Israel's security cabinet, but the 14-member body will meet later this week and is thought unlikely to reject the agreement.

Israeli army service

Ilan Grapel's friends and family say he was a law student in the US before he moved back to Israel in 2005.

He served in the Israeli military during its war in Lebanon with the militant group Hezbollah in 2006 and was injured in the fighting.

His family say he was in Cairo working for a non-governmental organisation when he was arrested on 12 June this year.

Egypt accused him of trying to stir up sectarian strife in Cairo on behalf of the Israeli spy agency Mossad.

However, on top of the Israeli denials, many Egyptians also expressed doubt about the allegations.

Sceptics on internet forums pointed out that Mr Grapel travelled to Egypt under his own name and posted pictures of himself on Facebook wearing an Israeli army uniform.

They accused the Egyptian military leadership of trying to use the case to divert attention from their own difficulties.

Israel and the US have for months been pressing the authorities in Cairo to release him.

Mr Grapel's father, Daniel, spoke briefly to Israel's Channel 10 TV on Monday evening.

"I haven't been officially notified, but I do know that things are happening between the US, Egyptian and Israeli governments," he said.

Egyptian prisoners

Egyptian state-owned television has said three children are among the 25 Egyptians to be released.

Israel stressed in its statement that none of the Egyptians had been involved in security-related crimes.

The deal comes less than a week after Israel released more than 1,000 Palestinian prisoners in exchange for the Israeli soldier, Gilad Shalit.

He had been held by the militant group, Hamas, which controls Gaza, since 2006.

Egypt's Al Ahram newspaper, which is also state-owned, said mediation by the Egyptian authorities in the Shalit deal had helped to clear the way for the Grapel agreement to be reached.

SHAH ALAM, Oct 22 — Himpunan Sejuta Umat ['Gathering of a Million Faithful'] said today the problem of Muslim apostasy in Malaysia was greater than what has been reported and suggested this was part of a global plan to destroy Islam.

Himpun chairman Mohd Azmi Abdul Hamid said while the government had released statistics on the number of Muslims who left the faith, this was just a fraction of those who had converted from Islam.

“That’s what was reported. It’s the ones that were not reported that we’re worried about because there are a lot that weren’t reported,” he told reporters here after closing the Himpun rally that saw just 5,000 Muslims turning up.

Azmi singled out Evangelical Christians as the key threat to Islam in Malaysia, and vowed that Himpun would ensure their plans to destroy Islam would not succeed.

“The enemies of Islam are global. Islam has been a problem to many of the Western Zionist movements,” he said.

“It is a well-known fact. There are people who see Islam as a target.”

Speakers at Himpun had earlier linked the Evangelicals to the global Zionist movement and alleged that the Christian faction viewed Islam as an obstacle” that must be overcome.

Azmi added that there was proof that the Evangelicals were actively trying to convert Muslims in Malaysia but did not cite his sources.

Himpunan Sejuta Umat was organised by various right-wing religious groups calling for Muslims to rise up and fight the “challenge of Christianisation”.

The mass rally was mooted following the controversial August 3 raid by Selangor Islamic authorities on Damansara Utama Methodist Church (DUMC), where it was alleged that Christians were converting Muslims.

It is illegal to proselytise Muslims in Malaysia.

With racial tension stoked in recent years by church firebombings and the cow head protest, today’s rally could resurrect fears of growing Islamisation among non-Muslims and more liberal Malays despite its poor turnout.

What race is Islam again? And who's stoking all that tension?

SHAH ALAM: Himpun (Himpunan Sejuta Umat Islam) ['Gathering of a Million Faithful'] got underway at the Shah Alam Stadium with speeches and the singing of religious songs Saturday.

Among the VIPs at the gathering were Perkasa president Datuk Ibrahim Ali and Selangor executive councillor Datuk Hassan Ali.

The people had arrived since noon under an overcast sky. Most media organisations reported the number of people present at 5,000. The stadium can seat 88,000. Participants at the rally were also seen with brochures titled Siapa bertanggung jawab kristiankan Melayu diSelangor (Who is responsible for Christianing the Malays in Selangor).

Event organizers have given their word that this event is 'non political'.

KUALA LUMPUR, Oct 18 — The Nasyid Artists Association of Malaysia (Munsyid) will take part in the Himpun gathering this weekend in a show of support and solidarity.

A coalition of Muslim groups are planning a rally called ‘Himpunan Sejuta Umat’ (Himpun), or ‘Gathering of a Million Faithful’, against Christians “challenging the sovereignty of Islam” this Saturday.

A million? The intended venue is a sports stadium that only holds about 80,000.

Organised by various right-wing groups such as Perkasa with the backing of both Umno and PAS Youth, the gathering could further raise religious tensions that have intensified in recent months following allegations of the proselytism of Muslims by Christians.

Raising religious tensions? Religious persecution of non Muslims by Muslims would be a far more apt description.

Representing 60 Nasyid artists in Malaysia, Munsyid will provide entertainment at the Shah Alam Stadium during the intermission of the Himpun event, which has been themed ‘Selamatkan Akidah Umat’, or ‘Save the Believers’ Creed’.

“We will use mainstream media, music and concert activities to help curb and stop this trend from prevailing,” said Munsyid advisor and Rabbani mentor, Sohibul Fadhil, at a press conference today.

“Proselytism of Muslims has been carried out through social services and entertainment, in a planned and civil manner on the pretext of religious tolerance.

See how those infidels are always plotting and conspiring against Islam? Again, no actual evidence is required; the Christians' mere presence in Malaysia is deemed as sufficient offense. That's why the Muslims are presumably planning a fresh binge of religious intolerance to remedy the 'problem'.  And to show us greater insight into this problem is the PAS Youth chief Nasrudin Hassan Tantawi, as quoted in "PAS divided over rally", by Sira Habibu, The Star, 19 Oct 2011:

[Nasrudin] said attempts to sway the faith of Muslims were being made via the 5F traps: food that is non-halal and harmful; fun that makes them idle to their religious commitments; broken families; films that are mind-corrupting; and fashion-wear that is sexually stimulating.

Food, films, fun and fashion -- who would have guessed that the followers of the 'perfect religion' were so vulnerable?

GEORGE TOWN (Oct 16, 2011): Investigations have found no evidence to support allegations of efforts to make Christianity the official religion of the country, Home Minister Datuk Seri Hishammuddin Hussein confirmed.

At a press conference today, Jelutong MP Jeff Ooi said this was in Hishammuddin's written parliamentary reply to Kulim MP Zulkifli Noordin, and therefore there is no evidence to incriminate any individuals in the matter.

Ooi pointed out that the investigation papers had been referred to the Attorney General's (AG) Chambers and the case has been classified as NFA (no further action) by the deputy public prosecutor.

In other words, after more than five months of investigating involving government prosecutors and going all the way to a major government ministry, with thousands of man hours and an untold sum of money expended, only now are the Malaysian authorities ready to drop the case that had precious little merit in the first place. No one can assert that Islam's permanent sense of conspiracy-addled paranoia comes cheap.

Zakhir Mohamed, the author of the blog ‘bigdogdotcom’ first suggested the existence of the alleged conspiracy, reporting a hearsay account of a plan to make Christianity the official religion of Malaysia and for a Christian to be Prime Minister.

The allegation was then featured on the front page of Utusan Malaysia on May 7. Another blog ‘Marahku’ also carried the allegation but later removed the posting.

They've learned well from Islamic groups in the West: all criticism is an act of hatred. All disapproval of various Islamic teachings and practices is an act of hatred. All accusations of wrongdoing are acts of hatred and the fruits of thoughtcrime.

"'US after fueling Iranophobia in world'," from Iran's own PressTV, October 14:

Iran's Permanent Ambassador to the UNESCO Mohammad-Reza Majidi describes Washington's latest allegations against Iran are part of the US Iranophobia project.

Majidi told IRNA in Paris on Friday that President Barack Obama entered the White House with a slogan of "change," however, like his predecessors he is dependent on different lobbies.

Wink-wink. They get more specific below.

The Iranian envoy said the US administration has created the recent media hype in an attempt to cover up its failures in Afghanistan and Iraq, and to divert attention from the nationwide protest rallies against poverty, unemployment, corporatism, social inequality, and other shortcomings.

Majidi said that the latest anti-Iran plot is in line with Islamophobia projected managed by the US.

On Tuesday, the US Justice Department accused Iran of involvement in a plot to assassinate Saudi Arabian Ambassador to Washington, Adel Al-Jubeir, with help from a suspected member of a Mexican drug cartel.

Iran's Foreign Ministry Spokesman Ramin Mehmanparast rejected the accusation, saying such 'ludicrous' claims hinged on the hostile joint stances adopted by the US and Israel against the country.

Iran's envoy to the UN, Mohammad Khazaei, has also filed a complaint against the United States, and described the anti-Iranian allegations as an “insult to the intelligence” of the people of the world.

“We are used to the baseless allegations made by some US officials over the past three decades, but the big lie they have told today is so unfounded that it sounds like the work of Hollywood's scenario writers,” Khazaei said in an interview with CNN on Wednesday.

“It is a major insult to the intelligence of ordinary people in the US and the world,” he added.

Obligatory:

The latest accusations come as the United States and its staunch ally, Israel, have devised numerous anti-Iran plots over the past years, including the targeted assassination of Iranian scientists.

It is a foregone conclusion that post-revolutionary Egypt will continue to have Sharia law as the basis of legislation in its next constitution, as is enshrined in Article 2 of the current constitution. Therein lies a perpetual source of instability: Sharia has something to say about every aspect of Muslim life, and there can always be more to enforce. Even Imam Rauf knows that Allah's own law, for those who regard it as such, does not lend itself to compartmentalization. Someone will always want more Sharia and be willing to kill and topple governments for it, as the fundamental aim of jihad in all its forms is the imposition of Sharia.

In particular, any state taking on Sharia (as is currently the case with Malaysia), eventually has to confront demands for the dhimma laws to subjugate unbelievers, and the hudud laws: punishments prescribed in Islamic texts such as amputation for theft (Qur'an 5:38) and lashes (Qur'an 24:2: "let no compassion move you") or stoning (Sahih Bukhari 8.82.816) for "adultery" (or rape without four "witnesses").

We are assured they are not really an issue... until they are. And they inevitably are, because a system of laws attributed to divine fiat is ultimately not served up a la carte.

"Salafi leaders reiterate demands for Islamic Sharia," by Hamdi Dabash for Al Masri Al Youm, October 6:

Prominent Salafi leaders on Thursday reiterated calls for applying Islamic Sharia law in Egypt in place of the man-made laws currently governing the country.

In a conference held by the Salafi-led Asala Party in Matariya neighborhood in Cairo, Salafi leaders lambasted those opposing the application of Islamic Sharia as "adulterers, thieves and immoral people."

Sheikh Shehab al-Din Ahmed said that it is time for the Egyptian people to vote for the party and the candidate that seek to apply Sharia, adding that it would be "a shame to ignore Islamic candidates."

All the Egyptian people want the return of Islamic principles to society in order to spread justice and mercy among the people, Ahmed claimed.

Although Prophet Muhammad said that although a person should not demand authority but should be given it without asking, a fatwa issued by Islamic scholars says that it is the duty of leaders to request authority for the purpose of applying Islamic rules. He added that God would punish them on the Day of Resurrection if they did not.

He indicated the existence of an anti-Egyptian conspiracy to keep people away from religion.

"The application of the French law in Egypt spread evils and corrupted the country morally, politically and economically, so there’s no other substitute for applying the Sharia," he said.

Mamdouh Ismail, Vice President of Asala Party said: “The enemies of Islamists in Egypt and abroad are preparing for a war to exclude us from political life so that we don’t apply Sharia.”

Prominent Salafi preacher Mohamed Abdel Maqsoud spoke in the same strain. "The people who don’t recognize Islamic Sharia won’t enter paradise,” he said, “because those who object to Islamic law don’t love God. And those who don’t love God don’t enter paradise.”

Participants raised banners that read: “With our soul and blood we sacrifice for Islam,” “The people want God’s law," and "Egypt is Islamic."

Hostage (n.): "A person seized or held as security for the fulfillment of a condition."

More on the conspiracy paranoia about "spies" and knee-jerk displays of antisemitism in post-revolutionary Egypt can be found here. "'Egypt mulling release of alleged Mossad spy Ilan Grapel'," from the Jerusalem Post, October 1:

Egypt is considering granting the release of Ilan Grapel, a dual US-Israeli citizen arrested in June on suspicion of being a Mossad spy, AFP reported on Saturday, citing the Egyptian media.

"Cairo is considering the release of Ilan Grapel, a US citizen accused of spying for Israel during the 25 January revolution, especially after promises from the US of offering more political and economic support in return," AFP quoted Egypt's official news agency as saying.

Egypt certainly seems less concerned about what Grapel came up with in his alleged "spying" than it is interested in seeing what it can get out of a deal.

According to the report, Grapel's parents were allowed to visit him on Saturday for the first time, along with US consul-general to Egypt, Robert Powers.

Egyptian daily Al-Masry Al-Youm reported earlier on Saturday that US Congressman Gary Ackerman had called for the release of Grapel in exchange for more aid to Egypt.

Grapel interned for Ackerman, whose office is near his home in Queens, in the summer of 2002.

He later served in the IDF and was wounded in the second Lebanon War, an incident that was well publicized.

The congressman described his former intern as “very liberal” and someone who “wants to help people in Egypt,” during an interview with The Jerusalem Post in June. He said he was in the country to help refugees from nearby African countries who had fled to Egypt.

“This is like no good deed goes unpunished,” Ackerman said. “He did some things that are frankly foolish... but a spy – give me a break!”

An Egyptian court ruled to extend the remand of Grapel by 45 additional days on September 14, Egyptian daily Al Ahram reported.

Grapel was arrested at his downtown Cairo hotel by Egyptian state security officers in June on suspicion of working for Israeli intelligence to foment sectarian strife and gather intelligence on post-revolution Egypt.

The "Usual Gang of Idiots" continues to write new material for al-Qaeda's mad magazine, Inspire, which sounds less like a jihadist tract and more like a bargain brand from the toiletries aisle. In any event, the latest round includes a denunciation of Ahmadinejad's peddling of 9/11 conspiracy theories that fail to give al-Qaeda due credit for its acts of jihadist murder.

And so for a moment, the Sunni-Shi'ite rivalry degenerates into "Did not! Did too!" "Al Qaeda chides Iran over 9/11 'conspiracy theories'," from BBC News, September 28:

Al-Qaeda has accused Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad of spreading "conspiracy theories" about the 9/11 attacks in 2001.

Inspire, an al-Qaeda-linked online magazine, described Mr Ahmadinejad's controversial speech to the United Nations last week as "ridiculous".

The Iranian leader said he believed the World Trade Center towers could not have been brought down by aircraft.

The article said such a belief "stands in the face of all logic and evidence".

Entitled "Iran and the Conspiracy Theories", the Inspire article said Iran used the theory "as a rallying call for the millions of Muslims around the world who despise America".

Iran "is a collaborator with the US when it suits it" nonetheless, the Yemen-based author said.

Could it be Imam Potrzebie? Or Samir Khan?

There have been sharp sectarian tensions between mainly Shia Iran and Sunni Muslim al-Qaeda - although are both fiercely opposed to US influence.

Mr Ahmadinejad's speech last Thursday triggered a walkout from the General Assembly by diplomats from more than 30 countries.

An update on this story. This report explains and translates the exact misspelling, and also sets her age as several years younger. Whatever her age, the uproar this supposed offense has caused among grown adults is beyond absurd.

"Pakistan: ten year old girl accused of blasphemy and sentenced for a spelling mistake," by Jibran Khan for Asia News, September 28:

Abbottabad (AsiaNews) - A spelling error has led to an accusation of blasphemy, and serious consequences for a Christian girl of 10 years of age and her family in Abbottabad. Faryal Bhatti, the daughter of a nurse, Sarafeen Bhatti is a student at Colony High School Havelian POF. On September 22, during an examination she misspelled a word in Urdu, putting the full top in the wrong place. Thus the word, referring to the prophet Muhammad, was transformed from "poem of praise" (naat) to "curse (lanaat). The Urdu teacher, Mrs. Fareeda, sternly rebuked Faryal in front of the class and took the matter to the headmaster, even though the child defended herself saying that it was a mistake.

The news of the alleged insult to Muhammad spread through the school, among teachers and the direction accused the girl of blasphemy. The school authorities informed the religious authorities who together with the inhabitants of the colony staged a demonstration, demanding the child be reported to police, expelled from school and her family expelled from the Colony. A mob chanted slogans against Christians, and in Friday sermons religious leaders denounced the episode as "a conspiracy against Islam", which was to be crushed.

In a meeting with teachers and religious leaders the child (in tears) and her mother explained that it was a mistake and apologized. Maulana Syed Ejaz Ali, a religious leader of the Jamia Masjid saw the piece of paper, talked with the child and mother and concluded: "I have no precise idea about the intentions of Faryal, her eyes filled with tears show her innocence, but the error has transformed the word into an insult and this is sufficient reason for a punishment, she should never throughout her entire life, think against Islam. "

To appease the religious the school administration expelled Faryal from school, Islamic clerics lobbied the Colony administration resulting in the mother being fired and forced to leave the residence. Both mother and daughter were transferred to Wah Cantonment by the hospital management. The Masihi Foundation has asked two Islamic clerics in Islamabad to give their opinion on the matter, Maulana Mehfooz Ali Khan and Hussain Ahmed Malik. Maulana said: "It is the innocent mistake of a child. Many Muslim students in the madrasas incorrectly pronounce the Arabic words, changing their meaning, you can not punish a child for an honest mistake, the girl was only 10 years old, she will carry this trauma with her. Faryal Bhatti has been subjected to all of this only because she is Christian, I protest against the decision to expel the young child and to transfer the mother. "

The bishop of Islamabad-Rawalpindi, Anthony Rufin, told AsiaNews: "I condemn the incident. Now, even Christian students are victimized and accused of blasphemy. Society is becoming so intolerant that a tiny error gets major attention. The ulema have decided on the punishment of a child who does not even know what she did wrong. They should have explained the mistake to her, if it really was a terrible mistake, in this way gaining her confidence and making a service to religious dialogue. What happened is exactly the opposite. "

That about sums it up. Ahmadinejad's spectacle at the UN has become something of a tradition by now. If the UN sold popcorn at this gathering, this speech would outsell anyone else's. Once again, he does not disappoint where antisemitism and conspiracy paranoia are concerned, with an extra touch of megalomania. "Walkout at U.N. as Ahmadinejad speaks," from CNN, September 22:

United Nations (CNN) -- Delegations from the United States and several European nations walked out of the U.N. General Assembly Thursday during Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad's speech, in which he repeatedly condemned the United States and said some countries use the Holocaust as an "excuse to pay ransom... to Zionists."

Delegates from France, Germany, and the United Kingdom were among those who walked out. Delegations from Canada and Israel were not present from the beginning.

In his remarks, Ahmadinejad called the September 11, 2001, attacks "mysterious" and said they were a pretext for a U.S.-led war against Afghanistan and Iraq.

He said the United States killed al Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden instead of assigning a fact-finding team to investigate "hidden elements involved in September 11."

He also placed blame on the United States for numerous global problems including the financial crisis, criticizing it for dominating the world's "policy-making establishments," overspending on the military, and "printing trillions of dollars" that triggered inflation, according to an English translation of his speech provided by Iran's U.N. mission.

Ahmadinejad said the U.S. government views Zionism as "sacred," and that "European countries still use the Holocaust after six decades as the excuse to pay (a) fine or ransom to the Zionists."

After assailing the United States, Ahmadinejad said "the main question is the quest for the root cause of such attitudes. The prime reason should be sought in the beliefs and tendencies of the establishment. An assembly of people in contradiction with the inner human instincts and disposition who also have no faith in God and in the path of the divine prophets, replace their lust for power and materialistic ends with heavenly values. To them, only power and wealth prevail, and every attempt must bring into focus these sinister goals."

On the eve of the address, the Iranian president declared his country to be "a new model for life to the world."

He also said that the United States might be willing to "hijack" the Middle East uprisings, according to the Iranian state-run news agency IRNA, but did not further explain his assertion.

Ahmadinejad's appearance at the United Nations in New York comes a day after two U.S. hikers, held in an Iranian prison for more than two years, were released.

Wednesday evening, Ahmadinejad met with a group of U.S. university students, and then gave an interview to Iranian satellite television.

His office provided translated quotes from both.

The Iranian leader said "that the world is in need of change, and Marxism, liberalism, humanism and the West could not solve man's problems," his office said. Ahmadinejad added that "relying on its culture and rich civilization," Iran is "the only nation" that "can offer a new model for life to the world."

He told the students "that the U.S. may be willing to hijack the regional uprisings but a stormy movement is under way," IRNA reported.

"Elsewhere in his speech, he said that the U.N. was set up with the objective of preventing bullying in the world, but this did not happen," IRNA reported....

Indeed. The OIC has made a booming business of it.

Exactly how would Israel benefit from yet another regime in the region being replaced by an even more hostile one? That's the handy thing about conspiracy theories, of course: they do not have to make sense, and even evidence against the conspiracy is somehow evidence of the conspiracy's existence.

"Algeria links uprising call to Camp David peace accords," from Middle East Online, September 15 (thanks to Twostellas):

ALGIERS - Foreign parties linked to Zionists are behind an online campaign urging Algerians to stage anti-government protests this weekend, Algeria's interior minister told local media Thursday.

Since late August, a call for an "Algerian revolution on September 17, 2011" has circulated on Facebook encouraging young people to flood the streets in opposition to President Abdelaziz Bouteflika's regime.

"Had it been people inside (the country), we would have exposed and arrested them, but the clues point us toward foreign parties in relation with the Zionist entity," Interior Minister Dahou Ould Kablia told the Ennahar daily newspaper.

The "proof":

The "proof", according to Ould Kablia, is that date chosen for the uprising is the anniversary of the Camp David peace accords, signed by Egypt and Israel on September 17, 1978.

The minister further noted that the massacres of Palestinian refugees carried out by an Israeli-allied Christian militia at Sabra and Shatila in Lebanon happened on the 16th and 17th of September, 1982.

"The choice of September 17 is no accident for the enemies of the Arab people," Ould Kablia told the paper.

"The calls are failing to elicit any response and there won't be any demonstrations or any trouble on this date," he said.

Protests in Algeria, inspired by uprisings in Tunisia and Egypt, intensified at the start of the year, but were effectively suppressed by the government.

Since then scores of political and social movements have emerged across the country, prompting Bouteflika to create a presidential panel that is currently weighing reforms.

Since the holy fasting month of Ramadan ended in August, riots broke out over insufficient housing.

We'd say you can't make this stuff up, except Ahmadinejad just did. Just when you think he has run out of new material, the conspiracy paranoia portfolio expands again. "Ahmadinejad: Zionists started both world wars," by Yitzhak Benhorin for YNet News, September 14:

WASHINGTON – Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad accused Israel of perpetuating terror, and blamed the "Zionist regime" for starting both the first and second world wars.

"The Zionist regime is always doing the same thing. They destroy people’s homes and raze them to the ground," Ahmadinejad told the Washington Post on Tuesday. "They have created a few major wars. They continue to assassinate and terrorize people; they continue their policy of coercion against other nations, including Iran."

The Iranian leader slammed the West for supporting the Jewish state, accusing the United States of sacrificing its "whole population" for "the interests of a few hundred Zionists."

"I think an important question that must be answered is, why do all US administrations always support the Zionist regime?" Ahmadinejad pondered. "The United States is 10,000 kilometers away from Palestine, and other nations in the region are against the Zionists, but the United States and its allies in Europe continue to support the Zionist regime. Why?

"I think you should have a referendum in the United States to see if the people want to use their resources and taxes for a number of killers," he added.

Dubbing Zionism "A dreadful party, a feared party," Ahmadinejad claimed that the movement "was behind the First World War and the Second World War. Whenever there is a conflict or war — this party is behind it."...

Associated Press photo.

The curious "bless our hearts, we're incompetent" defense by people who are otherwise strident, triumphalist Islamic supremacists also came up soon after the 9/11 attacks, as the Taliban moved to protect its al-Qaeda "guests."

Mahathir is thus not the first to use this line, though he is well known for his advanced case of antisemitism and conspiracy paranoia, having alleged in 2003 that "the Jews rule the world by proxy," and having said in 1970 that "the Jews are not only hooked-nosed ... but understand money instinctively. Jewish stinginess and financial wizardry gained them the economic control of Europe and provoked antisemitism." More of his antics and quotable quotes can be found here.

"Malaysia's Mahathir: 9/11 not work of Muslims," from Agence France-Presse, September 11 (thanks to Ima Freeman):

The long-serving former Malaysian premier Mahathir Mohamad says Arab Muslims are incapable of carrying out the 9/11 attacks on the United States that killed nearly 3,000 people.

The ageing firebrand, who was in power in Malaysia at the time of the attacks and stepped down in 2003 after 22 years in power, slammed former US president George W. Bush ahead of the 10-year anniversary Sunday of 9/11.

Washington blames the attacks on Al-Qaeda.

Does the AFP have an alternative theory they'd like to share?

"Bush lied about Saddam?s weapons of mass destruction... If they can lie so as to kill Iraqis, Afghans and American soldiers, it is not unthinkable for Bush & Co. to lie about who was responsible for 9/11," the 86-year-old wrote in his blog on Friday.

Listing out reasons in line with a conspiracy theory that the US government was behind the attacks, he wrote the Twin Towers in New York "came down nicely upon themselves".

"I believe Arab Muslims are angry enough to sacrifice their lives and become suicide bombers. But they or their handlers do not strike me as capable of planning and strategising such attacks so as to maximise the damage to the enemy," he said.

Mahathir, a fierce critic of the West, is known for his anti-Jewish and anti-American statements in Muslim-majority Malaysia.

Last year, he said if the US could make the 3D science fiction film Avatar, "they can make anything", adding there was strong evidence that the 9/11 attacks were staged.

He has also condemned Bush and then-British prime minister Tony Blair as "child killers" and "war criminals", saying they should be put on trial for the military invasion of Iraq.

A CNN producer, an Egyptian who was himself accused of being an Israeli spy, may have helped to avert another assault like that which Lara Logan suffered, sexually assaulted by a mob shouting "Jew! Jew!"

As for the American spy allegations, some thanks America gets for its support of the "Arab Spring." Unfortunately, there is more "thanks" where that came from. "Angry crowd turns on journalists reporting embassy attack in Egypt," from CNN, September 10:

Cairo (CNN) -- An angry crowd lingering near the Israeli embassy in Cairo after an attack on the building a day earlier turned on journalists reporting the incident Saturday, accusing at least one of being an Israeli spy.

As a CNN crew filmed the embassy from across the street, another crew from American public television -- led by Egyptian television producer Dina Amer -- approached the building.

The crew's Russian cameraman was preparing to film the embassy when a woman in the crowd began hurling insults at the TV team, Amer said.

"There was this older lady who decided to follow me and rally people against me," Amer recalled.

"She said 'you're a spy working with the Americans.' Then they swarmed me and I was a target."

A growing crowd surrounded Amer and her colleagues, as they tried to leave the scene.

Mohamed Fadel Fahmy, a producer working for CNN, rushed to help escort Amer through the angry crowd. But suddenly the two reporters were pinned against the railing of an overpass by young men who were accusing Amer of being an Israeli spy.

Yelling "I'm Egyptian," Fahmy managed to pull Amer another 10 meters down the road, until the pressure from the mob overwhelmed the pair.

Amer screamed as she and Fahmy were knocked to the ground and the crowd started to trample them.

Other CNN journalists tried to reach in to help, but were pushed back by a wall of angry men.

Fahmy lay on top of Amer, shielding her with his body.

"I was thinking, how powerless I was because there was no police to save us," Fahmy said. "I was worried that they were going to rape her."

At that moment, a student bystander named Mohammed el Banna called out to the journalists and pointed out a nearby car.

Somehow, Fahmy managed to carry Amer to the open door of the public television crew's car, where two of her female colleagues were waiting just a few feet away.

The mob pounded on the windows and tried to reach into the vehicle as the panicked reporters fumbled and struggled to get behind the steering wheel.

When Margaret Warner, a correspondent with the PBS program "Newshour" managed to get the vehicle moving away from the crowd, men threw stones at the departing vehicle.

Amer had few words to describe the terrifying ordeal.

"They were animals," she said.

Other Egyptian journalists told CNN they were also attacked Saturday while trying to report near the Israeli embassy. [...]

The emergency session concluded with a pledge to honor Egypt's international treaties and defend foreign embassies. The government also announced plans to re-activate the country's 30-year-old emergency law....

Can a squirt gun ban be far behind? If Tehran outlaws squirt guns, only outlaws will have squirt guns. More on this story. "Water gun fight in a park? Iran sees dark designs," by Nasser Karimi for the Associated Press, September 5:

TEHRAN, Iran (AP) — Iran is trying to put down a new wave of civil disobedience — flash mobs of young people who break into boisterous fights with water guns in public parks. A group of water fighters was arrested over the weekend, and a top judiciary official warned Monday that "counter-revolutionaries" were behind them.

They have been labeled as enemies of the Islamic revolution, which opens the door to accusations against those targeted as ringleaders of "waging war against Allah," or "spreading corruption in the land" (Qur'an 5:33) both of which Iran has prosecuted for.

Police swooped in to arrest a number of people who had gathered on Friday in a Tehran park to hold a water fight, the acting commander of Iran's police Gen. Ahmad Radan said, quoted in newspapers on Monday.

Radan said the group had been planning the water fight through the Internet and had "intended to break customs." He vowed police would act to prevent future attempts and [put] participants on trial.

Throughout the summer, Iranian police have been cracking down. In the first incident, in July, hundreds of young men and women held a water fight in Tehran's popular Water and Fire Park, spraying each other with water guns and splattering bottles of water on one another. Police detained dozens of those involved.

Since then, police have arrested dozens more involved in similar water fights in parks in major cities around the country.

Hard-liners see the water fights as unseemly and immoral, breaking taboos against men and women simply mixing, much less dousing each other with water and playing in the streets.

But authorities see a darker hand as well, worrying that the gatherings could weaken adherence among young people to Iran's cleric-led Islamic rule or even build into outright protests against the ruling system. Iran's leadership has been very wary of any gathering, whatever their nature, since the massive protests against the 2009 re-election of President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.

The anti-regime uprisings that spread around the Arab world this year only add to the leadership's worries of any sign of "people power."

On Monday, the spokesman of the judiciary, Gholam Hossein Mohseni Ejehi, accused unnamed foreign hands of organizing the water gun campaign.

"This is not simply a game with water. This act is being guided from abroad," he said.

Some of those detained Friday have admitted "they were deceived, and some said they came out based on a call from a counterrevolutionary," he said, quoted in the conservative news web site Tabnak.

Televised "confessions" for a water fight:

State TV has aired statements by some arrested in previous water fight crackdowns, admitting they were motivated by "foreign invitations." Some confessed they were given water guns to use. Most detainees were released afterward....

The "rebels" are now considered part of a broader Western "soft war" conspiracy to corrupt Iranian youth. If this hasn't been pinned on Israel yet, someone in Tehran must be asleep at the switch.

An update on this story. "Iranian police arrest water pistol 'rebels'," from Reuters, September 4:

Iranian police have started cracking down on water fights springing up across the country with the arrests of several young men and women who took part in the latest organized water pistol battles.

A water fight in a Tehran park on Friday, thought to have been organized through social media websites, was broken up by police who arrested several of the revelers, the semi-official Mehr news agency reported on Sunday.

"Some of these rebels who intended to play water fight were arrested by police on Friday," Ahmadreza Radan, Tehran's deputy police chief, told Mehr.

Mingling between sexes outside marriage is banned in Iran and conservatives in the Islamic Republic have been scandalized by scenes of dozens of youngsters spraying each other with water in public.

Various websites have posted photographs of girls and boys in wet clothes throwing water balloons, firing water guns and splashing each other with water from bottles after the first water fights were reported in the capital a few weeks ago.

The fights have since spread across the country despite warnings from authorities.

They are seen as the latest manifestation of youthful rebellion by Iranians against Islamic norms which require women to cover their hair in public and wear loose-fitting clothes, and where much Western entertainment is banned due to what is considered law morality.

Conservatives say the water fights must be stamped out to prevent what they say is the corruption of Iranian youths, much of which is blamed on a deliberate "soft war" by the West conducted through TV, films and pop music.

News website Khabar Online said police in the southern city of Shiraz arrested a man they said was organizing water fights though social networking site Facebook, which has been blocked by a government Internet filter but which many Iranians manage to access.

Six women and 11 men were arrested at a water fight earlier last month in the Gulf port of Bandar Abbas but released after 24 hours, Mehr reported.

"We have announced earlier that water fights and breaking the norms are forbidden... and the police will not tolerate that," Radan said.

"There are other aims behind this play... These people have committed very ugly and immoral acts."

More sterling behavior from the entity that wants to be handed a state in September without acting like one. This new form of blood libel has become popular in the past few years, bolstered by a bogus story in a major Swedish paper in 2009, and surfaces every now and then in one form or another.

Never mind the substantive accusations against jihadists in Kosovo of doing exactly what Issa Qaraqi is accusing Israel of doing. These allegations will be given far more credence.

They will also be used as a pretext for additional violence and threats against Israel, as Qaraqi surely knows. "PA minister claims Israel harvests Palestinian organs," by Herb Keinon for the Jerusalem Post, August 30:

The Palestinian Authority Minister of Prisoner Affairs Issa Qaraqi’ was quoted Sunday as saying Israel is the “major harvesting and trading center” of body organs in the world. His comments come even as the Defense Ministry is recommending to the government the release of a few hundred Palestinian prisoners to PA President Mahmoud Abbas in September to try and create a better atmosphere in the West Bank.

The prisoner release is part of a number of steps being discussed, including the return of the bodies of terrorists buried in Israel, whose goal is to improve the overall attitude on the Palestinian streets in advance of September.

The prisoners to be released would be Fatah members, none of whom is on the list being discussed for a possible deal with Hamas for the release of Gilad Schalit.

By contrast, the Saudi-based Arab News.com reported Sunday that Qaraqi’, “during the national day of Palestinian campaign to retrieve martyrs’ bodies,” accused Israel of harvesting parts from “the bodies of dead Palestinian martyrs without the consent of their families.” According to the website, Qaraqi’ said Israel was holding on to the remains of “Palestinian martyrs to conceal the crimes it committed against the martyrs’ bodies and to punish their families.”

Claiming that Israel was “holding the remains of 338 Arab and Palestinian fighters” in secret cemeteries, he said the “holding of the martyrs’ remains for many years casts doubts and accusations that Israel assassinated them after detention, or harvested their organs.”

The PA minister’s comments were swiftly denounced by Israel, with Foreign Ministry spokesman Yigal Palmor saying that by “promoting heinous lies and blood libels, the Palestinians may score a few cheap points among the ignorant and the racists, but they will not be gaining any dignity and respect.

Well said.

Dealing in hate mongering will not lead anyone to respect them,” Palmor said, adding that “they that sow the wind, shall reap the whirlwind.”

All of this should have been a non-event, even if the hikers strayed over the border. Only the Iranians know whether they are actually paranoid enough to believe the hikers were spies, or just saw an opportunity to seize the three and parade them before the world as trophies.

In any event, the two remaining in Iranian custody ought to be considered hostages. As long as they are detained, the Iranians will indeed attempt to use them as bargaining chips in any way they believe could work. An update on this story. "Two American hikers sentenced to eight years in an Iranian jail," from the Associated Press, August 20:

Two American men already held for two years in Tehran have been sentenced to eight years each in prison on charges of espionage and illegal entry into Iran, state TV reported on Saturday.

The announcement appeared to dash hopes for the imminent release of Shane Bauer and Josh Fattal after Iran's foreign minister suggested earlier this month that the trial could clear the way for their freedom.

The Americans deny the charges and say they were only hiking in a scenic and largely peaceful area of northern Iraq near the Iranian border.

The two men have been held since July 2009 after being taken into custody on the Iran-Iraq border. A third American who was taken with them, Sarah Shourd, was released in September 2010 on $500,000 bail and returned to the United States. Shourd's case 'is still open,' the website irinn.ir reported.

Bauer and Fattal's prison terms may also be used as leverage to attempt to make Shourd return for trial in exchange for reductions in their sentences.

The Americans say they mistakenly crossed into Iran when they stepped off a dirt road while hiking near a waterfall. While other parts of Iraq remain troubled by violence, the semiautonomous Kurdish north has drawn tourists in recent years, including foreigners.

The case has added to tensions between the United States and Iran that were already high over other issues, including Tehran's disputed nuclear program. The U.S. government has appealed for the two men to be released, insisting that they have done nothing wrong. The two countries have no direct diplomatic relations, so Washington has been relying on an interests section at the Swiss Embassy in Tehran to follow the case.

Earlier this month, Foreign Minister Ali Akbar Salehi said he hoped 'the trial of the two American defendants who were detained for the crime of illegally entering Iran will finally lead to their freedom.' Their lawyer also had expressed hope they might receive a pardon for the Islamic holy month of Ramadan....

There may well also be pressure on Fattal and Bauer to convert to Islam to improve their chances of Ramadan clemency.

Once again, you've got to hand it to the Global Zionist Conspiracy for their thoroughness. First, they went after the fenugreek, and now, not even the Gee, Your Hair Smells Terrific would be safe. "'Mossad plotted to harm Egyptian fertility'," by Roee Nahmias for YNet News, August 17 (thanks to all who sent this in):

Israeli citizen Ofir Harrari, recently accused by Egypt of spying for Israel, was allegedly involved in a complicated scheme intended to harm Egyptian reproduction abilities, Egypt's official state paper Al-Ahram has claimed.

Harrari, accused by Egypt of being an agent of the Mossad, is set be tried in absentia on charges of "spying for a foreign country with the purpose of harming Egyptian national interest," news agency MENA reported on Sunday.

Jordanian Ibrahim abu-Zaid, a telecoms engineer reportedly involved in the affair as well, was arrested in Egypt.

"According to the public prosecutor's office's investigation, 'Mossad agent Ofir Harrari' instructed Jordanian Ibrahim abu-Zaid to set up a company in Egypt which would exclusively import an Israeli hair product, for both men and women, which causes infertility. This in order to completely destroy Egyptian reproduction abilities," Al-Ahram states.

The report also asserted that the Mossad supposedly required that abu-Zaid open communications companies in Sudan and Libya, so as to enable Israel to follow communication traffic in both countries....

Is this guy some kind of Islamophobe? We have often quoted the Shafi'i jurisprudence manual Umdat al-Salik (The Reliance of the Traveler), here on many matters, including female genital mutilation, noting problems with the most common English translation. Enterprising amateur apologists have turned up in the comments section to claim that it's just one book that we've plucked out of the ether to defame Islam.

One problem there is that Umdat al-Salik was, in fact, certified as "reliable" by none other than al-Azhar University in Egypt. What's their excuse for not only failing to kick it to the curb, but taking the step of certifying it? They ought to know a "misunderstanding" of Islam when they see it.

And then there's this guy, corroborating the same teachings of the Shafi'i school, and invoking chapter and verse of the Qur'an (4:34) to defend a man's "right" to beat his wife. Gee, he must have some funky translation. That's what all the apologists tell us. And yet here is an Islamic cleric who seems to have his decoder ring on backwards.

"Female Genital Mutilation 'Is an Obligation' Says Mullah in Iraqi-Kurdistan," by Thomas v. der Osten-Sacken for Stop FGM Kurdistan, August 15, via the Assyrian International News Agency:

A mullah in Iraqi-Kurdistan talked in a Friday sermon about the new bill against domestic violence that passed the parliament of Iraqi Kurdistan in June. This law also forbids the practice of Female Genital Mutilation (FGM). Various clerics and members of Islamic groups started a campaign against this law and demand from the president of the Kurdish Regional Government (KRG) Mr. Massud Barzani not to sign the bill.

The mullah is one of the outspoken opponents of this bill. In his sermon he defends FGM as a Islamic practice of the Shafi'i law school. Additionally he defends the right of men to beat their women and children.

Here is a translation of some excerpts from his sermon:

A woman has the right to protest if her husband looks at her in a grim way. Allah says if a woman disobeys her husband he has the right to beat her, but the lashes should be according to the Sharia. It has conditions. (With the bill against domestic violence) the Kurdish Parliament has rejected Quranic law. (...) The parliament has also decreed that children should never be beaten for any reason. Even if the father comes home and the girl has a mobile phone in her hand that is not an excuse for beating her.

Of course she is a girl and will be encouraged in this bad world of today, she will have her mobile in front of her father flirting with boys and exchanging love phrases.. The father must sit cross handed in front of her, he must either kill himself if he has the least bit of honour left -- saying that if he doesn't do that he will lose his afterlife (...)- or he must assault his daughter who already has the numbers of the police stored on her mobile, calls this organization or that and complains that her father abuses her. The man will be put in jail for 6 months, and if the girl is not satisfied she can let him stay for 3 years and rot in jail. They will fine him 5 million ID. Is this the struggle for Kurdistan we are doing here? Is this the religion we have left? The situation is very dangerous but no one will follow you to the battlefield. The people don't have guts. If the people do have courage I will be the first to block Barzani's path. (....)

Then they come to the issue of circumcision. They have no problems left except the issue of female circumcision in Kurdistan. The mothers and sisters of more than half of your party members were circumcised. This means that you insult your own grandmother. You insult your own mother. You accuse them of ignorance. You dishonour your dead grandfather and burn his coffin for allowing the circumcision of your mother. Circumcision is a tenant [sic] of Islamic law (sharia). (...) (This bill is) to satisfy the Jews who in the conference of the Jews in Beijing discussed that female circumcision should be banned. You obey their orders and disregard the Sharia of Allah (...).

Not just the Jews. The Jews at a conference in Beijing. The conspiracy gets around!

They say if a mullah, a religious man, a father, a mother, a doctor or anyone else even mentions circumcision could be a good thing for women or if a woman feels uncomfortable and says that her mood was disturbed by that statement, she can complain to one of these organizations and agencies and they will take the mullah (...) to jail. (...) They can jail you for saying that circumcision is a good thing. The Imam Shafi'i (most Iraqi-Kurds belong to the Shafi'i law school) said circumcision is good! Aren't you following his denomination? Didn't the KRG president say that he is a Shafi'i? Your denomination says FGM is good, and that is why I am saying it is good. If you are honest in your denomination then don't accept this discussion to be held in the parliament. Imam Shafi'i is one of those who say that FGM is an obligation, that girls and women should be circumcised (...)

If I get asked about the religious ruling on FGM I must keep my silence and not dare to open my mouth. I must request to avoid this subject. As soon as I utter that FGM is good then they can arrest me. (...) If you don't accept this Mr. President you are the one who receives the project. You might say that you don't approve of the MPs. The people will love you for doing that. (...)

No longer should they ridicule our religion and believes [sic] and honours. We have made you president, you have the parliament and the oil and the money and no one is bothering you, why don't you leave our religion and honour intact?...

The full transcript and video can be found at the Stop FGM Kurdistan web page.