The crack Sharia Squad of the East Lansing, Michigan Police Department has gotten its man: they’ve “positively identified” the clown who burned the Qur’an on September 11. Now they just have to figure out what to charge him with, since burning a book is not illegal in the United States. But rest easy, Islamic citizens! Your religious feelings will no longer be hurt by this dastardly individual! And remember — if you’re more concerned about the Lebanese “Chicago man” and his bomb, you’re just a racist!
An update on this story. “Police Identify Individual Responsible for Qur’an Desecration,” from the City of East Lansing, September 16 (thanks to Comic Relief):
Police have positively identified the individual responsible for the desecration of the Qur’an on Saturday, Sept. 11.
The individual voluntarily surrendered to police officials on Wednesday, Sept. 15 following the establishment of a $10,000 reward fund. None of the reward funds were paid out to obtain the information leading to the individual’s identity. The individual continues to cooperate with police and FBI officials. The investigators have determined that this was an isolated incident.
It is expected that the police investigation will be completed early next week. The case will be forwarded to the Ingham County Prosecutor’s Office for review. No further information will be released until a decision is made about filing charges.
What charges? Littering?