This post could be entitled The Wacky Side of Sharia were it not for the unaccountable human suffering caused by #2 (and the beliefs that it echoed and reaffirmed) in the Islamic State, as well as in Nigeria. “Six weirdest fatwas of 2014,” Egypt Independent, December 30, 2014:
“God’s agents” — that was the term that famed 13th-century Islamic Jurist Ibn al-Qaayyim al-Jawziya gave to reflect how critical and sensitive it is to be a mufti, an Islamic scholar approached for religious opinions pertaining to all matters of Muslims’ lives.
Despite that sensitivity, several fatwas (religious edicts) that were issued throughout 2014 not only stirred controversy, but also inspired biting sarcasm from observers. Here are a number of those opinions that are believed to have failed to live up to the earnestness of the position.
1. Take a stealthy look at your bathing fiancee
Social network users circulated a video of preacher Ossama al-Quosy, who said it was permissible for a man to take a quick, stealthy look at his fiancee while she is showering, only on the condition that he has an earnest intention of getting married to her.
Literal interpretation of Islamic teachings prohibit women from showing any parts of their bodies, except the face and the hands, to men other than their husbands.
2. The return of concubation
A video was also trending on Youtube of Jordanian preacher Yassin al-Aglouny, in which he stated that female Syrian refugees are allowed to ask financially-able Muslim men to shelter them as “concubines.”
3. Open buffet is “haram”
Saudi preacher and member of Saudi Arabia’s senior scholars authority, Saleh al-Fawzan, had the lion’s share of contentious fatwas during 2014, most notably that open buffet banquets are impermissible on the basis that they do not quote a clear price for transactions.
4. Elections prohibited
Politics had their role in fatwas during the year, with the most outstanding political fatwa made by Sheikh Youssef al-Qaradawy, prohibiting participation in the presidential elections that brought Abdel Fattah al-Sisi to power.
Qaradawy is the chairman of the International Union of Muslim Scholars and an ardent supporter of Sisi’s predecessor, deposed President Mohamed Morsy.
5. Lying is halal
Contrary to the popular opinion, Yasser Borhamy, deputy chairman of the Salafi Daawa, said it was even permissible for a wife to lie to her husband to be able to get out and vote in the constitutional referendum last January.
Opponents to the document said the fatwa resembled a manipulation of religion for political goals.
Borhamy backed the ouster of Morsy in 2013 and the adoption of the new constitution.
6. Living on Mars impermissible
On of the weirdest fatwas was made by United Arab Emirates’ General Authority for Islamic Affairs and Endowments, prohibiting life on Mars. In an official statement, the authority said living on Mars was against Islam, responding to Dutch-run project, Mars One, which proclaims plans for a human colony on the red planet by 2025.
The authority’s argument was that heading to Mars would resemble a suicide given the dangers such a step could involve.
Salah says
Another weird fatwa: Sodomy is allowed in Islam as long as the goal is to kill infidels.
http://crossmuslims.blogspot.ca/2012/07/wide-anus-for-allah-anus-large-pour.html
Jay Boo says
In one of Anne Barnhardt’s videos she claims that a leading terrorist in Iraq was targeted on a Thursday because he and his cohorts got an imam to issue a fatwa claiming that Allah sleeps on Thursdays and that they were having their weekly get together for male gay Islam sex.
Peter Buckley says
There is much to laugh about in Islam. Take a look at some hadith:
http://www.councilofexmuslims.com/index.php?topic=4724.30
Angry says
Peter Buckley
There is, just visit the link on Salah’s post above, the text and video nearly had me urinating with laughter.
Jen says
SWEDEN: Muslim immigrants rape a young Swedish girl until bleeding with a gun shoved into her vagina, then they gang raped her several times more.
10 News When they had finished raping the girl, the man pressed the gun in her vagina, causing damage and heavy bleeding. Then two of the men drove the girl to a basement room in Rinkeby where they gang-raped her again. The girl is traumatized after brutal assault and currently lives in a sheltered accommodation. The men gang-raped the girl while one of them – an unidentified person – put a gun on her face and threatened to kill her if she did not stop screaming.
In the morning, the girl managed to get out of the basement and was found by er father who was out looking for her. After the incident, the girl was so traumatized and afraid of the perpetrators that she has been forced to move to a shelter.
Solna District Court sentenced immigrant Muslim men for the aggravated rape. One of them, a 21-year-old, was sentenced to five years in prison, while a 19-year-old gets two and a half years in prison. A 18-year-old was sentenced to youth custody for a year and four months since he was under 18 when the crime was committed.
The risk of being raped in Sweden during one’s lifetime is one out of four (if every raped woman is only raped once), which is probably equal to the risk of being raped in countries in war, such as Iraq or Syria. When it comes to rapes, Islamized Sweden is already in a state of war.
DENMARK: Somali Muslim asylum seeker breaks into a home and tries to attack a 14-year-old sleeping girl.
10 News (h/t nicolai sennels) A 14-year-old girl woke up when a young Somali man suddenly stood in her room and cuddled her on the leg and tried to kiss her. The 14-year-old girl managed to scare the man away by screaming. He fled to a nearby asylum center, where he was later found by locals from the girl’s village, Ranum, as a result of the girl’s description of the perpetrator. The North Jutland Police confirms that a Musim asylum seeker is suspected in the case.”
DENMARK: 8-year-old girl awakened in her bed by a Somali Muslim asylum seeker who tried to rape her and shouting, “Sex, Sex, Sex.”
Politirapporten The eight-year-old girl screamed, and alerted her parents who ran to her aid. Parents found a Somali man wearing socks and t-shirt the daughter’s room. The mother got her daughter out of the room while the father grabbed the perpetrator, wrenched a Vodka bottle from him and struck him twice with the bottle.
While the girl’s father struggled with the offender, the mother, daughter, and younger brother fled to a neighbor’s house, who then ran over to help the father with the offender, until the police came. The Muslim rapist is a 39-year-old asylum seeker with a residence permit in Denmark, who lives locally, says Police Commisioner Henning Svendsen. He is now charged with attempted rape, which he denies, saying he can’t remember anything because he was drunk.
http://www.barenakedislam.com/
Salome says
Is it too much to hope for that in the second and third cases mentioned, each perp gets a one-way ticket back to Somalia and a burly Danish escort to make sure he uses it?
Jen says
God I hope so. I can’t stand to read these horror stories any longer. These countries are in trouble if they reach the 20-30% Muslim mark. Any neighbouring countries in Europe which don’t fall to Islam will have to live alongside these newly created, hostile ‘Muslim countries’ as neighbours. Not really different to Israel’s position at the moment, is it. Neighboured by Islamic filth. There won’t be anywhere left to go. The west must have a lot of slow learners. The uprising in all of Europe should be overwhelming but it’s pitiful, relative to the number of people living there.
Look at politics in Sweden as well:
“The Migration Board estimates that a record 100,000 people or more will seek asylum next year in Sweden, population 9.5 million.”
“Analysts said there was a chance that voters would see the deal between centre-left and centre-right as a way to smother debate about immigration, benefiting the Sweden Democrats.”
“The Sweden Democrats had threatened to bring down any government that did not curb rising immigration, and to turn a snap election – which would have been the first since 1958 – into a referendum on Sweden’s liberal refugee policies.”
“Sweden’s three-month-old minority centre-left government announced a deal with the opposition on Saturday (Sunday NZT) to sideline the anti-immigration Sweden Democrats, who hold the balance of power in parliament, and avert a fresh election.”
http://www.stuff.co.nz/world/europe/64501791/swedish-opponents-reach-deal-to-avoid-snap-election
Jax Tolmen says
The sentences given for such brutal crimes against young women are almost as disgusting as the acts themselves. I am by no means a religious man – but there is still a special circle in hell reserved for rapists. All rapes are atrocities, but these almost made me sick.
Rapists should be executed, in the most violent way possible. It is a small measure of justice for the poor women who fell prey to these savages and their atrocious behavior. I can think of few acts more heinous or more despicable than the forcible rape of anyone – and what sickens me even further, is that some Muslim’s blame the victim for not being covered.
Islam promotes rape and condones the rapist.
Wolfpelt says
The root of the problem is the Muslim segregation of boys and girls. In so many Islamic communities young people are denied the freedom our young people have. No dating, no kissing and cuddling, no finding out about the other sex the fun way. In other words: growing up in a normal way is haram.
The result? Gangs of sex-starved young marauders hunting for female victims wherever they can find them. So until the Imamas wise up, no girl — be she Muslim or non-Muslim — is safe.
TH says
If there were any sanity in those countries the governments of them should all be lock up in jail for the rest of thier lives for imposing on their countries such mad policies.
Angemon says
Of course. Muhammad didn’t win any elections, he spread his will with a sword.
gravenimage says
This post could be entitled The Wacky Side of Sharia were it not for the unaccountable human suffering caused…
………………………………….
Well, that’s the problem, isn’t it? It’s easy to laugh at Fatwas about all-you-can-eat buffets and living on Mars—Fatwas about turning refugee women into concubines, spying on nude women, banning elections, and lying to Infidels, not so much.
Also. if Mars ever *is* fully colonized, I bet they’ll change their tune, and decide that Mars needs to be conquered for Islam. *Ugh*.
Meanwhile, good to know devout Mohamedans are taking a stand against the scourge of all-you-can eat joints…sarc/off
Phil says
The fatwa about Mars is about the only hopeful thing in the entire list. If/when Mars is colonized, hopefully the Islamofascist oil monopoly will be broken and the numbers of faithful Muslims reaching Mars will be very low. No bucks or marketable scientific/technical/cultural skills – no trip. And given the need the colonists would have to maintain a complex technical society, Islam won’t be a survival characteristic on Mars until the planet is fully terraformed (if ever). I’m sure when a colony becomes viable the muslims will insist on settling – after all, everything good achieved in life must be due to Islam, right?
Angemon says
Phil posted:
“The fatwa about Mars is about the only hopeful thing in the entire list.”
Unfortunately, I don’t share your hope. IIRC, the fatwa stated that if you go to Mars now there’s no assurance you’ll be able to live, and therefore it’s tantamount to committing suicide. If Western kuffars manage to make Mars sustain life, I’m sure the fatwa would be null and void and Mars would be just annother dar-al-harb.waiting to be conquered.
Mirren10 says
What other religion, in the entire *world*, comes up with insane crap like this ?
Absolutely none. Only islam.
And yet, leftard morons, useful idiots, mohammedan apologists, and our soi-disant leaders, keep touting this nauseating and risible claptrap as ”the wonderful peaceful religion of islam”, ”one of the world’s great ‘abrahamic’ religions”, a ”religion of peace”, and other assorted revolting rubbish !
It is to laugh …
Frank Scarn says
How about travel in space and Muslims?
Muslims have never been about innovation or decency. Islam was born in the 7th century and Muslims are bound and determined to keep it there. That’s where Muslim priorities lay.
And it’s all about priorities. Here’s an example.
Several years ago the Kuffir Space Gods had the bright idea of sending a Muslim (a Malay) into space. (Why? Some sort of outreach?) Only the Kuffirs could do such a thing because, on their own, the Muslims could never even think of such an adventure. Along the same lines that the new Muslim mega-clock in Mecca could never have been built without the ingenuity of the Kuffir. “O Allah [as in ‘I’ll hava Coke, or a Pepsi’], why have you cursed the best of people [the Quran-inspired descriptor used by Muslims to identify themselves] with no brains, but have amply supplied the infidels with knowledge & clear thinking, leaving us so ashamed and in poverty.”
But the Malaysian Space Agency (huh? who knew such an agency even existed!), a part of the Dept of Islamic Development Malaysia (cough, cough, “Islamic Development” exists in the same universe as “dry water”), wrestled with the greatest technical problem of the entire then-upcoming flight of going beyond the earth’s atmosphere. That problem, How to face Mecca from outer space?
That question, yes, that question, was the priority.
The result, A Guideline of Performing Ibadah at the International Space Station (ISS), which concludes, “It is hoped that this guideline could assist the Muslim Astronaut to ensure the success of the mission and at the same time attaining the redha (pleasure) of Allah SWT.”
Get that? The purpose of this nonsensical “guideline” (giggle) is to help the Muslim “ensure the success of the mission.”
This pdf guideline is found here,
http://makkah.files.wordpress.com/2007/10/a_guideline_ibadah_at_iss.pdf
This guideline also gives instruction on how to handle death in space. In case the deceased cannot “be brought to Earth for normal funeral process,” then “the deceased should be buried in space with a simple funeral process.”
Whew! A load off my mind. Leave it to the Muslim to come up with the really, really penetrating questions facing us all.
Except, how is one “buried” in space?
Mirren10 says
Oh, Lord ! 🙂
The mind simply boggles …
Salome says
Mars is looking attractive.
Mirren10 says
”Mars is looking attractive.”
It won’t be, once the mohammedans infest it.
Charli Main says
I thought that Mars already belongs to the Muslims.
Didn’t Mohammed stop off there for a quick pee, while on his journey to visit Allah on a winged horse ????
Champ says
7. Fun is out of the question ..got it, slaves!
There is NO FUN in islam. Nadda. Zilch. Only hatred, murder, and other such horrors, *are* permissible within islam. Any questions? Good, which leads me to #8 …
8. Common sense and Questions regarding islam are NOT permitted.
Got Questions? Too bad! Your brain belongs to allah, and allah does not permit you to engage in thinking and Questioning his evil ways. Period. You see, allah has done ALL of the thinking for you, so get with the program–or die. You are allah’s slave, and nothing should matter to you but carrying out allah’s evil agenga. Questions, thinking, and love ..well, those things are completely unislamic.
Mirren10 says
Good post, Champski ! So true.
Champ says
Thank you, Mirren10!
Paul says
Talking of Mars, if it was habitable and if it was possible to travel to
and from there, what is the likelihood Muslims would colonise in
huge numbers and then claim they were being oppressed by martians?
WestwardHo says
And that they are indigenous to it, and it was always a Muslim planet.
Paul says
Yes, I should have added that – we are all fully aware of the
usual tiresome and self-pitying list of bullshit grievances by now!
jay says
I’m surprised some Saudi billionaire hasn’t gone up to the moon and built a little mini-mosque on top of the US flag there, since Allah *is* the moon god and all…
Geoarrge says
It will only be haraam to live on Mars until a council of senior Islamic theologians is convened to settle upon a system for calculating the qibla.
Paul says
Other ‘un-Islamic’ things – human rights, sexual equality, animal rights,
freedom of expression and conscience, doing to others as you’d be
done to, love, empathy, a healthy level of introspection.
Oh, silly me, these things were already done away with long ago.
jay says
So we’re all moving to Mars, right? After 50 years or so when they’re all done killing each other we can come back and start cleaning up.
pumbar says
What an odd statement. Is Obama forcing you to change your nationality?
Mirren10 says
🙂
Rainman says
This really means war. ‘My favorite Martin’ was one of my favorite shows from the 60’s. Next thing you know they’ll be pointing at Uranus and saying its a shit hole.
Rainman……..
(please forgive me for that bad joke)
Anon says
Let us not forget all the great contributions of Islam to the world.
Terror and arrogance.
EgyptAir Flight 990
katarzyna says
“Les comediens” ala Sharia
http://www.examiner.com/article/egyptian-fatwa-women-who-swim-the-ocean-guilty-of-adultery
albert says
If only all the decent people could move to Mars we could leave all the Muslim “moderates”, rapists, jihadis, murderers, and their western socialists, liberals, democrats and PC idiots behind to live in their Utopian bubble.
james hazan says
Great news! a Mars without muslims j
duh_swami says
The fatwa about not living on Mars is good advice. The inhabitants of Mars, who live underground, have never experienced a full on invasion by anyone.
Most likely, they would just lock their impenetrable doors and not let any invader in. Since no one can survive on the surface without special equipment, they would all die or pack up and leave. There are other planets for Mahoundians to invade and live on…I hear Saturn is a nice place to live, if you can get there, and there is no fatwa against that..
Always On Watch says
So, there is humor in Islam?
Or idiocy, at least.
Sheesh.
jewdog says
Yes, but Mars has very cheap housing, and you can get a nice condo with a canal view. And there are very few car and church burnings there.
Johnny Canuck says
Any follower of Islam already lives on Mars.
Always On Watch says
Johnny,
Good one!
Space cadets and “out there.”