Next up on the arrest list: Robin Hood, Santa Claus and Bugs Bunny. This is the kind of thinking that can lead someone to believe that Zionists broke into his house and stole one of his shoes.
Islamic Supremacist Conspiracy Paranoia Update: “Iranian Ex-President Says U.S. Seeks Arrest Of Hidden Imam,” by Golnaz Esfandiari, Radio Free Europe/Radio Liberty, June 22, 2015 (thanks to Marc):
Iran’s former hard-line President Mahmud Ahmadinejad has reportedly said that the United States is working to arrest the Hidden Imam, who according to Shi’ite belief went into hiding in the 10th century and will reappear to bring justice to Earth.
Ahmadinejad made the comments in a speech to a group of clerics marking the start of the holy Muslim month of Ramadan, according to a transcript posted on June 21 on the website Dolatebahar.com, which is run by his supporters.
Ahmadinejad is quoted as saying that the West has been building a case against the Hidden Imam to prevent his reappearance, a claim that the Islamic republic’s main reformist daily newspaper, Shargh, described as “strange.”
“They’ve done so much research about the Hidden Imam in the human science universities of the United States that I am not exaggerating by saying that it is a thousand times more than all the work done in the seminaries of Qom, Najaf, and Mashhad,” he reportedly said, referring to three Shi’ite holy cities.
Ahmadinejad, who is known for his controversial statements and his devotion to the Hidden Imam, added that U.S. universities have debriefed numerous individuals who have been in touch with the disappeared spiritual leader.
“To quote a friend, they’ve completed a case against the Hidden Imam, and closed it also for his arrest,” he was quoted as saying. “The only [evidence] they lack is his picture.”
Ahmadinejad suggested that the West — and particularly the United States — sees the return of the Hidden Imam as a threat to its “empire,” adding that the U.S. administration is “evil.”
“It is really a government established by Satan to prevent reaching God and the Hidden Imam,” Ahmadinejad was quoted as saying. ” … This evil government knows that its end will come if the Hidden Imam reappears.”
He reportedly acknowledged that “some in Iran laugh about these comments.”
What? Impossible!
Cecilia Ellis says
“The only [evidence] they lack is his picture.”
– I see a Draw the Hidden Imam Contest in the making . . .
james hazan says
It,s the same with “Mossad stole one (shebsheb) slipper”,although this story must be true since Mossad’s agent was one legged
Don McKellar says
Haha!
“Mossad’s agent was one legged”
Now I’ve got images of Asghar Bukhari becoming like The Fugitive and doing a whole web series of himself on the run from the one-legged Mossad agent who stole his shoe!
The whole thing could climax with the final episode where Ahmadinejad guest stars and he and Asghar prevent the US government from obtaining a picture of the Last Imam! What a web series that would be!
TheBuffster says
Don! ROFL!!!
Maybe Bosch could do a comic book of it. 😀
john spielman says
OK OK, I confess I have the ‘hidden imam” in my basement but he won’t leave. He is nothing but a moocher, eating my food and drinking my booze and always on the phone and watching TV with the volume turned up all night long! He is nothing but a lazy no good tramp!
Brian says
LOL
CGW says
Are you sure that’s not your mother-in-law?
terry says
lol that is good humor!
spot on says
…And Obama is trying to give these kooks, nuke toys to play with.
gravenimage says
Hilarious, John!
And don’t forget all those long-distance calls to Iran—tying up the phone line, and you don’t even want to talk about the overages…
TheBuffster says
Yes!!! I’m getting tired of all the Mohammad drawings, anyway. Although… I imagine that the Hidden Imam looks just like Mohammad.
Maybe we could give him freckles.
No Fear says
I suspect that the hidden imam is an astrological occurrence. As we all know the precession of the equinoxes causes a shift in astrological signs every two thousand years. This was first discovered by the Greeks. We are entering the “age of aquarius”. There is a bible verse which mentions
“He (Jesus) replied, “As you enter the city, a man carrying a jar of water will meet you. Follow him to the house that he enters,”
The hidden imam is supposedly hiding in a well according to the Shiites.
Aton says
>>I suspect that the hidden imam is an astrological occurrence.
You have nailed it on the head there.
And Jesus was also a figure of the precession of the equinox. The last precessional change in the constellations happened in AD 10, when Aries turned to Pisces. And this is why Jesus was born as a Lamb of God (Aries) but became a Fisher of Men (Pisces).
Most of early Judaism and Christianity were astrological cults, which is why most of the early synagogues in Judaea and Jordan have a zodiac on the floor.
See the book ‘King Jesus’ by Ellis.
The zodiac in the synagogue at Hamat on the Sea of Galilee:
http://oi44.tinypic.com/2iidht2.jpg
.
john spielman says
nonsense, Jesus said to Peter that he Peter would become a fisher of men(not fish)
Huck Folder says
Sounds fishy to me.
Brian says
I’m a Gemini. LOL
epistemology says
I’ve been missing Mr. Ahmadshithead, he was always there for a good laugh. His jokes are the best, because the involuntary ones are really great. Now he’s riding again and as cracked as ever. Persecution mania and paranoia, my old friend Siggie Freud could have studied him for years. But here you go, Robert is right it’s the same level of paranoia as the guy who claimed the Zionists had stolen his shoe. No wonder muzzies never achieve anything in science rational reasoning is alien to their inbred minds.
He believes in American universities they’ve got nothing to better to do than study the complex personality of the hidden imam. Mr. Ahmadshithead you’re really crackbrained
Don McKellar says
I’ve been missing him, too! He’s like the gold standard of Islamic supremacist leaders — absolutely bat shit insane and funny as hell.
TheBuffster says
And in the photo, he looks like he knows he’s those things.
I think he should win a comedy award.
Linde Barrera says
To epistemology- Several years ago, when Ahmadinejad was president of Iran, I saw him being interviewed by a reporter from one of the big tv shows like “60 Minutes” or “20/20”. The reporter asked him: “How many homosexual men live in Iran, do you think?” The president replied “None. Not any.” !! Out of the millions of men in Iran, what might the conservative statistical odds be?
Angemon says
Linde Barrera posted:
“To epistemology- Several years ago, when Ahmadinejad was president of Iran, I saw him being interviewed by a reporter from one of the big tv shows like “60 Minutes” or “20/20″. The reporter asked him: “How many homosexual men live in Iran, do you think?” The president replied “None. Not any.” !! Out of the millions of men in Iran, what might the conservative statistical odds be?”
He might actually be close to the truth on that one – homosexuals don’t live in Iran, they’re hanged by their neck from construction cranes until they die.
Linde Barrera says
To Angemon- As always, YOU are in top form! I want to compliment you by quoting bus driver Ralph Kramden (played by Jsckie Gleason) from the old tv series, “The Honeymooners”. “You’re a riot Alice.”!
Aton says
Don’t knock it too hard. There are plenty of Bible-belt Americans out there who talk to Jesus and want to see the Rapture. All sects who believe in eschatology – that god will destroy the world – are believing in an evil god – only the devil would want to murder several billion people.
No Fear says
Yes, I was raised a Jehovah Witness. They believe that God will destroy all wicked people on the earth. If that idea is taken literally God would be a monster. If the Witnesses decided that THEY were going to be the ones who were going to do the killing then I would call them monsters. But they are pacifists.. In reality by acting in sexually moral way they are simply minimising corruption of their DNA by viruses and therefore they are affecting future evolution of man. In that way they are “killing off all evil” on the planet in a harmless way. i.e. good breeding practices combined with non-aggression.
Contrast that with Islam’s assertive (aggressive) nature. I am very concerned that believers in Shiite eschatology will deliberately cause a nuclear holocaust to MAKE their eschatology come true so that they appear to be correct to their followers. It is very scary when you read about their “end of days” scenarios and the fact that they are on the way to nuclear bomb production…
FredvanH says
I am absolutely 100% certain that, as soon as they obtain the bomb, they will use it.
Mix says
I am absolutely 100% certain that We have it for 40 years but we never used it even when the world attacked us on Iran-Iraq war
Jeremy says
The destruction will make more sense when the whole world is an Islamic hole, people will be glad to see Jesus, and help him destroy the one world government, and establish his own. After that, the stars getting rolled up like a carpet, and new Jerusalem (old one is presumable covered in depleted uranium and burnt mosques).
marc says
Aton. Not heard of an APB out for Satan though have we, or accusations he’s hiding in mecca, islam has taken silliness to a whole new level (yet again). Shouldn’t really be confused with the many righteous Jews and Christians out there who live today as if the Messiah might arrive tomorrow.
jewdog says
My entry in the “Draw the Hidden Imam Contest”:
Huck Folder says
First you have to name him.
Him?
Him her or it.
Gender confused.
It’s common name is “onster”
* Some consider it to be related to the ancient Persian Pharaoh Astur
(descended from Astaroth) who married his sister Bator
their only living his/hermaphodite child
bore the name Astur-Bator.
Mirren10 says
🙂
Nice one, Jewdog.
john spielman says
maybe Jihad Watch should publish a poster like “where’s Waldo?” except where’s the Hidden imam?
Angemon says
Some in Iran, many in the rest of the world…
Fr. Basil says
If he’s hidden, how can he found to be arrested? And on what grounds?
oldwhiteguy says
we need to drop an invisible bomb on the invisible iman in the invisible building or well that he is busy being invisible in. a big enough bomb should do it.
Westman says
Everybody wants to get into the act!
“Last year a seminary expert, Mehdi Ghafari, said that more than 3,000 fake Mahdis were in prison. Mahdi-complexes are common, says a Tehran psychiatrist. ‘Every month we get someone coming in, convinced he is the Mahdi,’ she says.”
http://www.economist.com/news/middle-east-and-africa/21576700-authorities-think-too-many-people-are-claiming-be-mahdi-youre
It doesn’t look like Iran needs any help arresting “The Mahdi”
Huck Folder says
Must be hilarious at Mahdi Gras.
TheBuffster says
Huck – ROFL!!!
TheBuffster says
This JihadWatch article has spawned more hilarious comments than any other I’ve read here. I have tears running out of my eyes!
Kepha says
Hmmm. There are lots of Western loons who think they’re Jesus Christ or Napoleon. A professor in Israel once mentioned that he had taught six people who claimed to be the M’shiach. So, it appears that when a Shi’ah Muslim gets unhinged he thinks he’s the Hidden Imam.
Bandit 4 says
oh shit…they’re on to us!
duh_swami says
The best time to arrest Mahdi is when he is playing golf.
“It is really a government established by Satan to prevent reaching God and the Hidden Imam,”
That Satan guy really gets around…He’s over there, he’s over here, he seems to be everywhere, causing trouble wherever he goes. If anyone should be arrested it’s him.
Westman says
An amusing tongue-in-cheek article about who the Mahdi might be. This article was actually believed by some to be real. It’s a joke.
“He is half black, half white. He is tall and strides with a lope. He possesses dead eyes and prominent ears. His background is both obscure and exotic. He is persuasively eloquent and is adept at saying one thing while doing another. His head swivels from side to side when addressing the multitudes, as if reading from prepared texts no doubt lowered from on high and inscribed by the Lord or one of his angels. ”
http://www.jihadwatch.org/2014/01/the-twelfth-imam-has-returned
ICH says
COOCOOOOOOOOO
What a total idiot hahah
mortimer says
I must debunk what everyone says here, including Ahmadinejad. The Hidden Imam lives under my bed and eats Fruit Loops every morning for breakfast.
gravenimage says
Mortimer—I was wondering, are Froot Loops Haram or Halal?
It turns out I am not the only one wrestling with this burning question:
“Are Kellogg’s froot loops cereal halal or haram? please let me know I tried googling couldnt find a (sic) answer please help”
This is not a joke—I found it on “Shia Chat”. (OK—it is a joke, but only for us impious Infidels):
http://www.shiachat.com/forum/topic/76257-keloggs-froot-loops-cereal/
Here’s my favorite answer:
“i think if you were to ask your marajah, he would say “if its ingredients are haram, then it is haram.”
Who can argue with those words of wisdom?
But if the Mahdi is chowing down on them, that’s good enough for me…
But I hope he’s not eating *Marshmallow* Froot Loops, or else it might not be the Mahdi lurking under your bed at all, but rather the Daajal!
“Are Kellogg’s Marshmallow Froot Loops Halal?”
http://www.halalhubusa.com/unleafed-marshmallow-froot-loops/
Linde Barrera says
To gravenimage- Good morning from Starbucks! I just read within the last 72 hours that Kellogg’s products are not selling like they used to because of GMO (genetically modified organisms). I do not know if this was actually true or a joke, or an outright lie, because as you know, there are lots of items on the internet that are pure bogus. But if it were true, would the GMOs make it haram? Have a sweet day.
No Fear says
I tried eating Froot Loops but the Jooooooooooooooooos made them go soggy.
Jan says
Mortimer, you’d better remind the Hidden Imam not to eat his Fruit Loops in the morning. It’s Ramadan and he needs to eat his Fruit Loops after sundown.
miriamrove says
See. This is what happens when you believe in Islam. You become delusional!! That is one of the many side effects of Islam!!!! M
Grumpyoldguy says
The hidden imam is in The U.S. Marshall’s WitSec program. He’s been relocated to the small farming town of Speed Bump, ND.
It’s rumored that he may be going to welding school, and working part-time at Slappy’s Bait Shoppe.
Joseph says
@ Grumpyoldguy
No wonder why the guy behind the counter at Slappy’s didn’t want to touch my bag of pork rinds.
Joseph says
No wonder our universities are pumping out kids that are no smarter than when they went in. Instead of learning something useful they spend all their time looking for the hidden Imam.
I bet NASA is also a front to look for him in space and to launch spy satellites to cover more ground on Earth.
Deep tunnel projects in New York, Chicago Milwaukee……not for water runoff/supply or transportation, you got it Imam.
All those drones flying in the M.E.—Imam
Obama-care—maybe the Imam will register for affordable health care(which it is not)
Our national debt would probably be zero if it weren’t for this damn Imam
TruthWFree says
Amazing that someone like Ahmadinejad could have been the leader of a country with 70 million people. This should be proof to many…even liberals…that brokering a deal with Iran on nuclear capabilities is as dumb as Obama can get. Obama may have these same sentiment about the Islamic Mahdi.
somehistory says
O—[—–( If they had his picture, it might look like this. A skeleton. The ribs, metatarsals, phalanges, femurs, etc. were taken away, perhaps by wild dogs.
This guy is not only a muslim, a hater of all good things, arrogant, evil, etc., but he is a nut and not in a good sense of the word. He’s a poison nut.
Homer says
It is clear that Ahmadinejad is himself the hidden imam. The proof? Anagrams of HIDDEN IMAM are IHMDINEMAD, AHMDINEMID, etc., which are all so close to AHMADINEJAD that any coincidence is ruled out. So, it will come as no surprise if Ahmadinejad is arrested one of these days.
Badbob says
Yeah the Cia has satellites over every well in the Middle East…..÷)
TheBuffster says
This cuckoo clock actually believes we kafirs believe in his Hidden Imam.
tilda says
Ahmadinejad: US is working to arrest Hidden Imam
Bukhari: Mossad stole my shoe
Obama: Denying climate change threatens national security
It is the dawning of the Age of Lunacy.
Kepha says
When the Loon is in the big White House
And stupider goes o-o-o-on the nooooooz
Then riot governs cities
And wants to kill the Jooooooz
It is the dawning of the age of the idiot
The age of the idiot…..
Sorry, to all fans of _Hair_. I am, after all, a child of the Silly ‘Sixties and Sillier ‘Seventies, much as I regret it.
Linde Barrera says
To Kepha- Love your original adaptation to “Hair”!! I was born in 1951, so I too am a product of the ’60’s. And you absolutely must remember one of the leading mantras of that era: “Baby, when you got it, flaunt it.” So rid yourself of any regrets from that historic era! Peace.
Champ says
Woo-hoo, someone has lost his marbles!
alyn21 says
I see Mr wack job is back.