What fun this will be!
I look forward to visiting the Apes and Pigs Pavilion, where Allah transforms disobedient Jews into those despised animals: “And well you know there were those among you [Jews] that transgressed the Sabbath, and We said to them, ‘Be you apes, miserably slinking!’” (Qur’an 2:65). “Say: ‘People of the Book, do you blame us for any other cause than that we believe in Allah, and what has been sent down to us, and what was sent down before, and that most of you are ungodly?’ Say: ‘Shall I tell you of a recompense with Allah, worse than that? Whoever Allah has cursed, and with whom He is angry, and made some of them apes and swine, and worshippers of idols — they are worse situated, and have gone further astray from the right way.’” (Qur’an 5:59-60)
From there we can go on to the “Pretend to Be Friends to Infidels Pool,” where we can dive in and enjoy the warm water of a friendship and alliance that our Muslim friends entered into in order to protect themselves from us: “Let not the believers take the unbelievers for friends, rather than the believers — for whover does that belongs not to Allah in anything — unless you are doing it to guard yourselves against them.” (Qur’an 3:28)
After that, we’ll dry off and head over to the games. We can start with the Terror Toss. First one to cast terror into the hearts of the unbelievers wins a plush teddy bear: “We will cast into the hearts of the unbelievers terror, because they have associated with Allah that for which He never sent down authority; their dwelling shall be the Fire; evil is the dwelling of the evildoers.” (Qur’an 3:151)
Then grab your tongs and Snag A Sex Slave! First one to pull three topless Barbie dolls out of the glass case can turn them in at the Main Office for your very own full-size (nine years old and up) real-life captive that your right hand possesses! “If you fear that you will not act justly towards the orphans, marry such women as seem good to you, two, three, four; but if you fear you will not be equitable, then only one, or what your right hands own; so it is likelier you will not be partial.” (Qur’an 4:3)
If you’re not happy with her, you can turn her in at the Beating Booth, where you can administer Islamic justice on her: “Righteous women are therefore obedient, guarding the secret for Allah’s guarding. And those from whom you fear disobedience, warn them; banish them to their couches; and beat them. If they then obey you, look not for any way against them; Allah is All-high, All-great.” (Qur’an 4:34)
And if that doesn’t slake your thirst for righteousness, head over to Uraina Field, where you can join in a rousing game of Chase the Apostate. First one who catches him, well, you know what to do! “They wish that you should disbelieve as they disbelieve, and then you would be equal; therefore take not to yourselves friends of them, until they emigrate in the way of Allah; then, if they turn their backs, take them, and kill them wherever you find them; do not take to yourselves any one of them as friend or helper.” (Qur’an 4:89)
Still eager to set the world right? I don’t blame you! Let’s head over to Chop ’em Circle, where we can take care of those who dare to “fight against Allah and his messenger”: “This is the recompense of those who fight against Allah and His Messenger, and hasten about the earth, to do corruption there: they shall be slaughtered, or crucified, or their hands and feet shall alternately be struck off; or they shall be banished from the land. That is a degradation for them in this world; and in the world to come awaits them a mighty chastisement.” (Qur’an 5:33) Oh, and thieves, too: “And the thief, male and female: cut off the hands of both, as a recompense for what they have earned, and a punishment exemplary from Allah; Allah is All-mighty, All-wise.” (Qur’an 5:38)
Then comes the crown and center of the theme park, Jihad Jamboree, where all paying (and praying) attendees over the age of 18 are issued swords and scimitars. Idolaters and People of the Book are bussed in especially for the occasion. But those crafty devils will be hiding (be sure to listen to the trees; they talk here, just like in Lord of the Rings!), so your work will be cut out for you before you can do any cutting of your own: “Then, when the sacred months are over, kill the idolaters wherever you find them, and arrest them, and besiege them, and lie in ambush everywhere for them. But if they repent, and perform the prayer, and pay the alms, then let them go their way; Allah is All-forgiving, All-compassionate.” (Qur’an 9:5) “When you meet the unbelievers, strike their necks, then, when you have made wide slaughter among them, tie fast the bonds; then set them free, either by grace or ransom, till the war lays down its loads…” (Qur’an 47:4)
Kids will enjoy collecting the jizya from the subjugated People of the Book: “Fight those who believe not in Allah and the Last Day and do not forbid what Allah and His Messenger have forbidden — such men as do not practice the religion of truth, even if they are of the People of the Book — until they pay the jizya with willing submission and feel themselves subdued.” (Qur’an 9:29)
Qur’an Theme Park: it’s the best theme park in the world, because the reward is Paradise! “Allah has bought from the believers their selves and their possessions; for that they shall have Paradise. They fight in the way of Allah; they kill, and are killed…” (Qur’an 9:111)
And remember: if you meet any Infidels while browsing through the Qur’anic flora and fauna, you know how to act: “Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah, and those who are with him are ruthless against the unbelievers, merciful one to another.” (Qur’an 48:29)
Qur’an Theme Park: it’s nonstop fun for the whole family! There’s just one catch: you can’t leave.
“Dubai to open ‘Quran Park’ showcasing miracles of Islam,” Al Arabiya, May 8, 2018:
Dubai is set to open a “Quran Park” that will display plants mentioned in the holy book, as well as the miracles mentioned in the Islamic scripts.
While a date hasn’t been announced yet, Dubai officials have said entry to the park will be free.
Among the prominent features of the park are a Cave of Miracles and the Glass House.
Dawood Abdul Rahman Al Hajiri, Director General of Dubai Municipality, was quoted as saying by Gulf News: “Among the most important elements of the project is the Glass House containing the plants mentioned in the Quran and Sunnah, which grow under certain temperatures and special environmental determinants, as well as shops selling herbs and plants mentioned in the Quran.”
The Cave of Miracles reportedly showcases seven miracles mentioned in the Quran displayed with the latest modern interactive techniques.
“The park also consists of 12 gardens containing the plants mentioned in the Quran and Sunnah, with its scientific and medicinal benefits and uses, including bananas, pomegranates, olives, melons, grapes, figs, garlic, leeks, onions, corn, lentils, wheat, pond beans, ginger, tamarind, basil, pumpkins and cucumbers,” said Al Hajiri….
Mak says
Here’s a tip. Should you visit Qur’an Park don’t think that the stuff in the soda machine is Mellow Yellow. It’s camel piss. Which you know, cures diseases according to mohammed.
Miracles of Islam. Unless they have spritzers that spray you in blood every few minutes I’m not sure what else constitutes anything else islam has contributed to.
mortimer says
CAMEL COLA the BEVERAGE OF THE PROPHET!
mortimer says
CAMEL COLA! (you’ll get used to the taste … but maybe not)
Axis porcinus says
Soon to be a best seller Diet Camel Cola with black cumin..cures everything, Fine print: except death.
Lydia Church says
The only ‘miracle’ is that anybody believes this balderdash!
Lydia Church says
balderdash=islam.
Figured that was self explanatory.
Mark Swan says
Good One Mr. Spencer, Thank you.
blitz2b says
“. ..I look forward to visiting the Apes and Pigs Pavilion, where Allah transforms disobedient Jews into those despised animals:..
Cool….. Progressive Islam? The Quran teaches evolution ……. In reverse !!!
Carolyne says
I kinda like pigs. I think they are cute. Muslims not so much.
gravenimage says
Pigs are quite intelligent, as well…
Peggy says
gravenimage says
May 10, 2018 at 4:13 pm
Pigs are quite intelligent, as well
====================
Unlike Muslims.
Ren says
The miracle of islam is about a pedophile, a thief, a murderer and a terrorist being a prophet of god. That is the miracle of islam.
Japetto Danatelli says
One of the best one-liners I’ve ever read in JW. Let me buy you a beer, even though I don’t drink. 🙂
Ren says
I don’t drink beer neither but a glass of red wine would be fine. Thanks ?
gravenimage says
+1
mortimer says
A special hit among Muslims will be the WALL OF SKULLS pavilion featuring displays of JIHAD TROPHIES from Serbia, India, Southern Italy and Anatolia.
In addition to the WALL OF SKULLS pavilion, there is the SLAVERY IN AFRICA PAVILLION featuring displays of jihadi techniques used throughout Africa to HARVEST several millions of BLACK SLAVES for Muslim harems and hot KITCHENS or SWELTERING FIELD WORK in Muslim countries.
There will be pictures of SUMPTUOUS PALACES and IMPRESSIBLY LUXURIOUS MOSQUES all built by SLAVE KAFIR LABOR … as was the Taj Mahal.
WOW! Islam is a SLAVE CULTURE! Time for the young Muslims to TAKE BACK THEIR RIGHTS and learn how to DEAL ISLAMICLY WITH THE DIRTY KUFAAR!
gravenimage says
+1
JW_Reader says
Add a pavilion of useful idiots who help spread the miracle of Islam, like Obama, Hillary, John Esposito, karen Armstrong and off course, papa francis.
LB says
Funny you should mention Wall of Skulls and Serbia in the same sentence. There’s an infamous Skull Tower in Nish (one of Serbia’s big cities) which was constructed by Ottoman Turks out of the skulls of Serbian soldiers during a rebellion in early 19th century as a warning to anyone else who might dare to rebel against them. Read more if you’re interested here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skull_Tower
gravenimage says
Yes–hideous. This is the sort of thing Muslims build.
PRCS says
“The park also consists of 12 gardens containing the plants mentioned in the Quran and Sunnah, with its scientific and medicinal benefits and uses, including bananas, pomegranates, olives, melons, grapes, figs, garlic, leeks, onions, corn, lentils, wheat, pond beans, ginger, tamarind, basil, pumpkins and cucumbers,” said Al Hajiri….”
And a camel urine bar?
Bobby says
Banana Akbar!God is grape.
PRCS says
Heh!
Carol the 1st says
Now they’re worried about some kind of mad camel disease. Makes you wonder if it’s been here all along.
JF says
This is hysterical! Thanks for allowing us to so freely laugh at this ridiculous political ideology posing as a ‘World Religion”.
gravenimage says
Dubai to open ‘Quran Park’ showcasing miracles of Islam
………………………..
Oh boy! Sex slaves and slaughtering the Infidels whereever you find them! Fun for the whole family–after all, there’s wife-beating, too!
Save Europe says
There’s also FGM, stoning, honour killings, Bacha Bazi, Taharrush Gamea to also include!
gravenimage says
True–I just scratched the surface of all the fun to be had!
HugoHackenbush says
Can’t wait to see the date piles and bowls-of-milk exhibit. Muhammad makes Jesus with his one episode of loaves and fishes look like a piker! Hey! It’s right in the Hadith, many episodes of such “abundance miracles” attested to by many close followers so how could it not be TOTALLY TRUE!!?? A question though. How are they going to depict his trip to heaven when his wife, Aisha, said he never left the house?
Ashley says
That was a terrific opening commentary, Robert!
I laughed so hard I woke up our old deaf dog.
Stacy Girl says
Apes and pigs would be superior to the human debris who will visit.
CogitoErgoSum says
Will they try to make it like Paradise? Will there be streams flowing with wine at the park? Will Mom let Dad visit the houris after that refreshing dip in the stream? And what about the kids? Will they join the little pearly boys in finding out what fun is really like in Paradise? Are there any plans in the works for building a Hell theme park for the infidels?
Mateen Elass says
“Apes and pigs pavilion” — Good one, Robert!!!
Personally, I will head to the “Fry the Jinn” exhibit, where participants can fire shooting stars at the miscreants to drive them away from Paradise.
Next, I’ll head to the Olympic-size pool fed by the muddy springs into which the sun sets every night, and hope to catch a glimpse of that great Islamic saint, Alexander the Great, otherwise known as Dhu’l Qarnain.
Diane Harvey says
And at the time of Maghrib (sunset prayer time) the whole park will be able to witness another miracle of the Qur’an (Surah 18.86), the setting of the sun in a muddy pool. Attendance will be mandatory.
from David Wood,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bOA_IPva5-g
Brother Charles says
Muslims still do not admit it ?. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FdWyM3MBm4Y&t=6s&list=WL&index=4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=huW-wJqpjJ0&t=0s&list=WL&index=2
tedh754 says
It would be a miracle if we can have one day without an atrocity committed by a Muslim.
Mak says
ROTFL!
I wouldn’t hold my breath for this one.
gravenimage says
That’s one miracle Islam can’t provide…
Japetto Danatelli says
Spencerrrrrrr! You killed my funny bone with this one! haha!
“Cave of Miracles,” lol, that’s where they hire an actor to roll on the floor like an epileptic and babble out violent and hateful verses.
It doesn’t matter how hard they try, they can never beautify the ugliness of islam. Hate and bigotry, no matter what the setting, is still hate and bigotry. It’s like putting a murderous gangster in a classy 5k suit, they’re still a thug in need of the electric chair. This would be funny if islam weren’t so murderous and immoral. But the fact that islam promotes bigotry and murder for religion makes this theme park seem demented and evil to me. It just goes to show how steeped in denial they are about their own phony religion. They don’t have the courage to reform their own religious errors that cause murder and hate, so they try to hide the ugliness with pretty flowers. This has a shocking effect on my mind. All I can think of is the countless millions that have been tortured and murdered and suffered for islam’s depraved and retarded morality, and when this evil is juxtaposed with a delightful theme park it seems like a vomit-inducing mixture of stinky sh*t with luscious whip cream. No thanks, islam will never be something beautiful and worthy of respect in my mind. It’s childishly ignorant, but in a dangerous and immoral way. It doesn’t deserve a lovely theme park, it deserves a cemetery with an epitaph to always remind us of the evils its caused.
Japetto Danatelli says
P.s I meant no offense to “epileptics” with my feeble humor, its a sad ailment that deserves compassion and understanding. Thanks.
CogitoErgoSum says
I understand your meaning. The theory that Muhammad suffered from epileptic seizures fascinates me. I have checked YouTube for videos of a person undergoing a seizure and have found several ranging from small infants to grown adult men and women. I find those videos all very disturbing. The ones of infants especially break my heart.
Those undergoing a seizure seem to go into a trance where they see and hear something the people around them cannot. I can imagine that an occurrence so mysterious being witnessed by a group of people who have no idea about what is happening would leave a lasting impression. If a person prone to such seizures could figure out how to use the seizures to make himself seem like he was conversing with a heavenly spirit he could gain a great deal of power and control over others. It’s very possible this is just what Muhammad did. He could compose his “revelation” shortly before or after one of his seizures (real or faked) and ascribe it to God. Descriptions of Muhammad receiving a “revelation” correspond in many ways with a person having an epileptic seizure.
gravenimage says
We had a cat who suffered from epilectic seizues–we were finally able to control it with medication. She was never evil, though…a very sweet cat, in fact. My husband and I both miss her.
Ashley says
Oh, Graven.
We had to put our beloved Rye down a few weeks ago. He had issues all his life…slept in his litter box preferring to eliminate in radiator registers, refused cat food and would only eat popcorn and blue corn chips, and would only drink beer. He wouldn’t touch water.
He never was right in the head since spiking a 107 degree fever as a kitten.
We enjoyed 14 great years with him. He was a marvel and we miss him something awful…
I’m sorry for your loss…
gravenimage says
Ashley, I’m so sorry to hear about your dear kitty Rye. It is hard to lose a friend.
Molly–the cat I was referring to–we lost a long time ago. The vet said we much extended her life by treating her epilepsy, though. We have had many great cats since then–including the two rescue kitties, brother and sister Will and Ali, who we have now.
HugoHackenbush says
Based on descriptions of “when the divine inspiration would come” in Bukhari it is more likely that Muhammad had migraine with aura and visual/auditory hallucinations. A seizure disorder would have left him far less functional although temporal lobe epilepsy could also have been the issue.
gravenimage says
True, Hugo–but the “Prophet” still reacted to it by going out and slaughtering dogs, including the little puppy under his bed.
God, I hate Islam.
Ade Fegan says
The only miracle is that there are so many fools who believe in it !
Rarely says
It’s all they know. They’ve never been taught or experienced anything else so of course they believe it. To perpetrate that ignorance islam has to be against education.
jude newman says
House of horrors is more like it.
Lydia Church says
Nailed it!
And yes, this was hysterical!
The activities are endless….
Linda says
Too bad Muslims aren’t into Halloween. They could come up with more than a few ideas for haunted houses.
boakai ngombu says
when evil jinn are about much fear arises and can be “seen” in every corner
Linda says
Even the jinns have nothing on ISIS or so I hear.
Bobby says
It’s not a museum,it’s a kitchen.
FYI says
The famous prophets of islam exhibit should be amazing..
Moses the muslim ,leading the Palestinians out of slavery in Egypt which was run at the time by the Israeli Jewish Pharaohs of Zion.
Jesus Christ the muslim prophet who will return someday to wipe out all the Christians and” kill all the pigs”
Then there is the famous converts to islam exhibit depicting famous people in world history who were actually muslims..
Shakespeare,All Jewish scientists,Zoroaster,Buddha,Mahatma Gandhi,Cleitus the slack jawed yokel,Homer Simpson,Mickey Mouse,Moshe Dayan..
And maybe there should be a video message of congratulation from that great modern prophet of islam,
the prophet Barack Obama…
Rarely says
The washrooms, oops, misnomer. The toilet rooms all bear the inscription: “Muslim contributions to the World”.
Mak says
Toilets? Such western nonsense in the house is islam is blasphemy.
boakai ngombu says
but there could be private holes, around which could be patches of viewing glass to observe the flow to the underground rooms – dhimmly lit – where the subjugated endure abasement of all kinds…much to the satisfaction of the “wonderful” people above.
gravenimage says
Muslims had nothing to do with developing indoor plumbing. Maybe wiping with rocks, though…
PRCS says
The primary miracle is that–despite all the scientific to the contrary–so many Muslims believe all that nonsense
Believing that Muhammad split the moon and rode on a winged ass as but two examples of that.
Rarely says
You’d believe it too if that’s all you were ever taught. You don’t need to be gullible or stupid.
gravenimage says
It *is* possible to reconsider what you have been taught.
There may be a few places where this is close to impossible–if, for instance, one is an illitrate herdsman in Afghanistan.
But most Muslims are not this isolated–most could take a close look at their foul creed, but don’t want to. Those who are principled and do so are brave apostates.
PRCS says
Thanks for your response.
Taught from childhood.
Conditions permitting (though improbable/close to impossible in a community of illiterate Afghan herdsmen):
“It *is* possible to reconsider what you have been taught.”
Muslims in America might choose to not fact check those teachings, but should they chose to, they could.
Ex-Muslim organizations/websites attest to that.
gravenimage says
True. I have thr greatest respect for Muslim apostates.
gravenimage says
the
Save Europe says
And so it appears…. Muslims ARE truly mentally ill!
Linda says
It’s all that inbreeding.
dsinc says
And all the low IQ’s
somehistory says
Free or not, it’s a huge waste of space. islam has no “miracles.”
And all of the plants they wish to connect with the beastly islam are creations of the True God.
Besides the rape and murder and lies, islam offers only emptiness. Nothing good has ever come from it.
somehistory says
And lest anyone reading it, think that “rape, murder and lies” are “something”….they are worse, so much worse than just leading an empty existence. Emptiness of any spiritual life, added to the practices of evil…how much worse could it be?
Thomas Kimball says
Hey Abdul were you going this summer after you get out of bomb making school? “I’m going to Qurandy Land”
PRCS says
+1
Mark Spahn (West Seneca, NY) says
America should have such an Islamic theme park of its own. I understand that CAIR is working, through its Florida real estate lawyer Myron Mosqowitz, to acquire an island in the Florida Keys,
http://www.fla-keys.com/islamorada/
where they will build an all-weather resort to be known as Islam-O-Rama. How did this island acquire such a meaningful name? It’s just another miracle of Allah’s foresight and providence, like arranging for camels to be retromingent for easier medicine collection.
Linda says
Islam-O-Rama? OMG! Now I have heard it all!
somehistory says
The name is for the string of islands…”Village of islands” and is not pronounced the same as islam.
Island…i land. And morada- abode or island abode, island home.
This “purchase” for islam is just to plant themselves and pretend it is pronounced as islam orada instead of isla morada.
They will bring ruin to a nice area as they have done in so many other places.
gravenimage says
Yes, somehistory–this is Islamorada, Florida. The name means “Island Home” in Spanish and has *nothing* to do with Islam.
Some Muslims have nonetheless cited it as a “Muslim name” in America, allegedly proving how influential Islam has been in the United States. More claptrap, of course.
somehistory says
Having been born in Florida in a family with a long, long history of being born in Florida, I feel protective of the place.,
And each patch of dirt moslims claim here just sickens me. It is an invasion by a murderous cult of people who wish the rest of us to be enslaved by them.
But my faith helps me look forward to a better day, a better time.
gravenimage says
Yes, somehistory–I am sick to see Muslims worming their way into beautiful Florida.
Xero_G says
I’ll be waiting near the “Homo Toss” bungee jump off the high rooftop of the visitor center.
Indiana Tom says
What bungee?
PRCS says
Heh!
Brother Charles says
It will be closed before its open if IRAN continues being stupid , so no one will see the miracles ( what miracles ) of Islam .
Indiana Tom says
Animal petting and sex zoo. Bacha Baz and Bach Bazi playground area for special man boy activities.
gravenimage says
Ewwwwww!
Sam says
So exciting news. I can’t wait to see Islamic miracles people have been misinterpreting for centuries.
Walter Sieruk says
Well, since Dubai has open a “Quran Park” , which is Dubai government sponsored, this is a reminder the ,if only for the sake of balance, in America in Washington DC there is a “Museum of the Bible” which privately is sponsored by American Christians. The Bible Muslim is also open to the public with free admittance.
gravenimage says
That’s about all they have in common…
Debi Brand says
Excellent work, Robert. (Hilarious…)
I can’t hardly wait to get there…
So too, until they likewise create, like, I’m thinking, “Hadith Haven.”
Just fathom it—see, hear, downright experience, as it were, the “yearning palm trunk.” Perhaps, they will have contest, to see, who can best match or exceed the sound of “the yearning palm trunk.”
As Qadi Iyad relates, “The hadith about the stump corroborates” the reports about “the yearning palm trunk.” The hadith “is famous in itself and well known.” ( Iyad, Ash-Shifa, Medinah Press, Bewley, 2008, p. 168.)
Moreover, “it is related by many paths of transmission.” Additionally, “the Sahih collections relate it.” Add to that, “It is related by about ten of the Companions.” Not the least of them, the likes of “Ubayy ibn Kalb, Jarir ibn ‘Abdullah, ‘Anas ibn Malik, ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Umar,” etc. (Ibid.) If we cannot trust them for reliable transmissions, who then can we trust?
The story is this: “The mosque was constructed of the trunks of palm-trees with a roof laid on top of them.” Open-air style. And, allegedly, when the alleged “Prophet addressed the people, he would lean against one of the trunks.” (Ibid.) And, allegedly, the trunk really really liked that.
So much so, in fact, that, allegedly, “when the minbar was built for,” Muhammad, and then, when he addressed the people, instead of leaning on the said palm trunk he would stand at the minbar–snubbing, as it were, the said palm trunk—the trunk felt the pain of that.
And when that happened, allegedly, the people said, “we heard that trunk make a sound like a camel.” (Ibid.)
Of that trunk–all but, if not right on, unbelievable—“The Prophet said, ‘This trunk is weeping at the remembrance of what it has lost.” (Ibid.)
Anas related, the trunk moaned, “ Until the mosque was shaken.” Sahl’s relates, upon hearing the moaning of the stump, the “People” joined in with the moaning, they, “wept a lot.” (Ibid.)
Moreover, all that continued–the trunk, the people, all, as stated, bellowing like camels in distress. In fact, the little said palm trunk, bellowing so heartedly, the narratives indicate, it began to convulse intensely, “Until it nearly split and burst apart.” (Ibid.)
“At which,” fortunately, for all there, “the Prophet came to it and placed his hand on it. Then it was still.” (Ibid.)
Good thing “the Prophet” did that, because, according to “Another …. If he had not taken care of it, it would have remained moaning like that until the Day of Rising….” (Ibid.)
Fathom, that: had he not stepped in, the trunk, to say little of the people, moaning until the Day of Rising, “ moaning, “out of grief for the Messenger of Allah.” (Ibid.)
As mentioned, in Hadith Haven, that could wonderfully make for a good competition…
The said trunk, so unique allegedly was it, that, one time, the Prophet, knowing how much the little tree loved him, “The Prophet called it to him and it came furrowing the earth, and clung to him.” (Ibid.)
What a special, all but believable, little tree. “Then, he [Muhammad] commanded it to return to its place,” and of course, the record indicates, it did just that.
Nonetheless, whenever it heard the voice of the Prophet in prayer, “the trunk would lean towards him.” (Ibid.)
Special palm trunk indeed. “In the hadith of Ubayy, it mentions …. When the mosque was demolished, Ubayy took it [the palm-trunk],” and with him it remained, “until termites consumed it and it turned to dust.” (Ibid.)
And shame me should I not mention the “dancing,” as it were, mimosa tree, moving in from where it was rooted on the edge of the wadi. “Dancing,” as it were, while it advanced.
As the “Messenger of Allah,” allegedly, called out, “‘Come Tree!'” the little “tree leaned to the right,” then, to the “left, in front and behind,” wiggled and rocked, as noted, “to the right,” to the “left, in front and behind.” (Ibid, P. 165.) Thus “It came dragging its roots and clattering.” (Ibid, PP. 165, 166.)
Thus it allegedly did. Pulling up its roots while it did so. Coming thus, spilling the earth before it as it approached. Dragging behind it, just as we would expect, its by then uprooted roots. Doing so, until, it stood before the alleged prophet. (Ibid.)
And there, allegedly, it stood. There summonsed to testify of the verity of Muhammad’s message. There to obey his every command. Thus, the little mimosa tree danced …
It was in this wadi, wherein, hadith relates, a Bedouin who allegedly witnessed the account, so moved by it was he, states the record, he said to the “Messenger of Allah,” “ ‘Give me permission to prostrate to you.’” (Ibid, P. 165.)
Whereat, allegedly, the “Messenger of Allah,” said, “If I had commanded anyone to prostrate to anyone, I would have commanded the woman to prostrate to her husband.’” (Ibid.)
Thereupon, relates the record, the bedioun begged permission be granted him to kiss the hands and feet of the Muhammad, thus, “He gave him permission.’ [Al-Bazzar]” ( Iyad, Ash-Shifa, Medinah Press, Bewly, 2008, P.165.)
That too, very probably, make for a good competitive game, as it were…
And, certainly, this section should include a mock-up of the running “Scattered palms,” and the same of like-kind stones. In mass, coming near one another. The mass of them creating, as it were, an instant, desert johnny-on-the-spot.
As it was alleged, on one of his raids, needing “a place to relieve himself,” “The Messenger of Allah said … ‘Is there anywhere?’” To which, relates the narrative, “Usama ibn Zayd said … ‘I said, “ The wadi does not have any place in it for people,”’” To which, allegedly, the “Messenger of Allah” said, “Did you see a palm tree or a stone.” And Usama, answered, he had indeed seen “some scattered palms,” and the same of stones. (ibid, P. 166.)
Thereupon, allegedly, “The Messenger of Allah” told him to, ‘Go and tell them that The Messenger of Allah commands them to come to his aid.’” Thus, the narrative relates, Usama did as instructed to do, and so did the palm tress and stones. Hence, as noted, the alleged miraculous biffy. (Ibid.)
It is all going to be, as Spencer stated, so much fun, at last, the peoples, able to see the true nature of Islam.
gravenimage says
I’m waiting to see the talking rocks and trees that say, “O Muslim! There is a Jew hiding behind me; come kill him!” Entertainment for the whole family!
PRCS says
Yes, as the thread actually is about “the miracles of Islam”, there really should be a talking rocks and trees exhibit.
Debi Brand says
Absolutely, PRCS, it would be less than complete lacking it.
PRCS says
Would be a very popular exhibit, I suspect.
Especially for the kiddies.
Debi Brand says
Indeed, g.i.
Unbelievable, inimitable family fun for everyone–to say little, of the, “by feel, can you [in the desert darkness] tell which one is your ‘wife’ for the night” game–uniquely Islamic, rich with the flavor, and more, of, of course, the alleged “messenger,” family fun for all…
Carol the 1st says
And let’s not forget the jolly Taharrush game!
Carolyne says
I’d like to see the flying donkey with Big Mo on top. I think it would be hard to tell which one is the jackass.
Carolyne says
I always did enjoy a well-stocked minibar.
Debi Brand says
“I always did enjoy a well-stocked minibar.”
What a history they have, eh?
Giacomo Latta says
Quran(9:2) and (9:5) state ‘So travel, O disbelievers throughout the land during four months … and when the sacred months have passed then kill the polytheists wherever you find them,’ So enjoy your vacation to Islamland but make it quick.
PRCS says
Make it quick…..
Funny.
AleX says
At the souvenirs’ stands:
Buying souvenirs for wives:
1. Sticks not bigger than a man’s thumb. Just in case you fear disobedience from their part.
2. Buckets full of stones for actual stoning
gravenimage says
+1
Firefox says
The biggest miracle of Islam is that there are so many misled by Islam’s absurdities. Don’t think. Never question. Follow blindly. There, you are a practicing moslem.
Debi Brand says
“The biggest miracle of Islam is that there are so many misled by Islam’s absurdities. Don’t think. Never question. Follow blindly. There, you are a practicing moslem.”
And for countless in the nation of the alleged,”Prophet, Muhammad,” they do the above because of fear of the ever-present looming unsheathed sword [of “believers”].
“… there are so many misled by Islam’s absurdities. Don’t think. Never question. Follow blindly…..”
Why do so many do just that?
As stated above, as Islamic history and “sacred text” bear out, because of the threat of the looming sword.
HugoHackenbush says
Have some cartoon suggestions for the children’s section:
https://youtu.be/QIwUpvf2jXY
https://youtu.be/miw_Jw7j2sE
Wear rain gear due to exploding heads.
Rob H says
All funding for this amazing park will go to religious organizations such as: Hezbollah, ISIS, Al Qaeda, Hamas, Taliban, Al Shabaab, etc., etc.
Rob H says
I mean “all proceeds’–the funidng obviously comes from those organizations